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>As a white male you haven't experienced any of that, which is fine!

You know absolutely nothing about this person and yet feel completely at liberty to issue blanket statements about their life and what they have experienced and how they 'should' feel.

White privilege is obviously real. However, that doesn't mean that a white male hasn't ever been nervous around the police or felt queer thoughts.

This is why people resent contemporary 'identity politics' and 'diversity' initiatives. Not because of the end goals themselves (that is, to mitigate racism and prejudice) but because the rhetorical methods currently employed are cloying, tone-deaf, and frankly just plain condescending. The overall point you are making is a noble and important one - to self-reflect and put yourself in other people's perspective - but I don't think this is the most effective way to convey it.

See my edit, please.

"As a white male you haven't experienced any of that,"

Not all white males are the same and face the same challenges. Life is very different if you are good looking, tall, athletic, outgoing vs. being short, non-athletic, nerdy and socially awkward. I was in the second group and faced a lot of discrimination, bullying and ridicule when I grew up. I probably had a lot of advantages too but it's not that simple. There are plenty of rich non-white kids who probably have it much easier than most whites.

But obviously you haven't faced the specific set of challenges that only apply to non-white or non-male people. That is what the parent is suggesting, that it is helpful to have support groups containing people who have faced the same sorts of challenges as you. That doesn't mean that all non-white or non-male people universally have harder lives than all white/male people.

Of course not, but the clumsy racism of the grand-grandparent poster immediately invalidated all of the otherwise good points that were made and clearly turned off a wide swath of an otherwise reasonable and receptive audience. There's quite a few politicians that could learn a great lesson from this thread.

It's not the responsibility of nonwhite/nonmale people to package issues of racism in a pleasing way for white/male people. Implying as such is basically implying that white/male people are the gatekeepers of respect and consideration. maxxxxx asked a question and PhasmaFelis gave an answer which is consistent with the reality of the situation. It's not a pleasing answer because race issues are not a pleasing topic.

No need to package them in a pleasing way, but factually is important. No special kind of respect or consideration is necessary -- just don't tell other people what experiences they have or have not had based on their skin color when you know nothing about them.

What racism?

Then I'm not sure why it's so strange to you that people might want to associate with folks who've grown up with the same hardship. I'm a nerdy white guy with autism; I probably went through much the same shit you did. That's why I sympathize with other minority groups. I know how much it sucks to face discrimination for something you were born with, and I want everyone who's suffered that to find welcoming support.

Then shouldn't you start a short nerd ERG instead of a white male ERG?

I am starting neither. But if I followed the normal pattern i would start a male or a white group. All other groups we have are either gender or ethnicity based.

>As a white male you haven't experienced any of that

This is almost unbelievably blind.

See my edit, please.

>I was addressing the poster directly.

You don't directly know what the poster has gone through. Prefacing the statement with "as a white male" implies that you know what the poster has gone through because of his race. It is willfully blind. You can make convincing statements that white people in general in certain states at certain times face certain kinds of systemic discrimination. You cannot truthfully make the statement that the poster has not encountered serious discrimination, malice, or personal difficulties merely by knowing his race and sex.

>presumably hasn't experienced that, or they'd immediately understand

This is a Scotsman fallacy. I am certain I could find some people who have faced terrible racism that would agree with the poster's opinion.