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Comment by kelukelugames | Hacker News Reader

I feel like non consensual anything adds stress. One of my least favorite things is being hugged by people I work with and I always feel awkward turning down a co worker.

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I don't even like handshakes. I've seen countless people leave the restroom without washing their hands. Some people get offended if I won't shake their hand.

> I've seen countless people leave the restroom without washing their hands

I am not a germaphobe at all (I'll eat food off the floor if it falls), and I agree 100%. The non-washing of hands is endemic.

Fist bump to the rescue!

"I've got a cold, and you don't want it. Fist bump?"

"Power hugs" (my off-the-cuff term), in various formally defined and social settings. (Not as in mutually energizing; rather, like a couple of levels worse that the aggressive hand-shaker.)

Ugh

Why are you hugging your co-workers?

> Why are you hugging your co-workers?

I get the impression that they were on the receiving end of the hugs :)

Presumably the coworkers want to hug him or her but they don't want to be hugged.

I've never been in a position to have to turn down a coworker's hug (thankfully), it seems very odd indeed. Like the GP, I woudln't engage in that sort of physical contact with coworkers.

There are workplaces where hugging is almost mandatory.

I've worked in such places. Kissing on cheek etc is also a thing. It will be interesting to see where that leads in the long tail of the #metoo change. I've already seen a lot of people who I've known to overly hug and show affection at work stop doing so. At one workplace HR got all "scorched earth" policy and made it very clear it wasn't acceptable at all. Apparently the concern was women initiating contact then feeling uncomfortable later and complaining about the person they hugged. Two instances at that site alone. I wonder how frequent it is since I'd never heard of it as a thing before.

Some people lean toward the hug as a greeting or farewell, especially women. As a woman who doesn't like hugs, it's very uncomfortable for me. I used to work at an agency, and sometimes we'd even end up hugging clients after a big meeting.

Hang on for an uncomfortably long time and you'll get fewer hugs in the future. (assuming the hugger is just a platonic hugger)

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