May I ask why you're hiding your gender on HN? I know of many potential reasons, just curious what yours is.
You're all so anti-sexist it sickens me. Whenever a female posts, you put away the boxing gloves and take out the kid skin gloves. The only people that actually say negative things are the unapologetic sexists, and no, I don't like that either. But it doesn't bother me as much.
So it might just be my imagination, but just to be safe I prefer to be one of the guys for my recreational forum activities.
Also, I see that happen a lot more not because of gender, but because we're discussing gender issues. Anytime someone brings up a sensitive issue people are going to tip-toe more, regardless of the attributes of anyone actually bringing it up.
I support your right to portray yourself in whatever light you can muster, but there's no shortage of critical thinkers on Hacker News.
The phenomena that you're describing is often called "othering" and it generally sums up nicely as "a room full of dudes bending over backwards to be so accepting to a woman that it's creepy". It is a real problem.
However, I know I'm not the only person on here who couldn't care less what your gender is. I want to respect you for what you produce, and I'm not going to mince words if I think something is goofy.
Being a radical is tiring and it's not cool to put the onus for change on women, who I suspect get worn down demanding equality. I know that I would.
Yet, there are times and places where major gains come only from sticking your neck out once in a while. Being a woman on HN might be one of those places.
As a case in point, it wouldn't have occurred to me that the OP (limedaring) was female if I saw her posting in another thread, even though I recognize her name from elsewhere and could tell you she was female if I thought about it.