Ask HN: If you are 30+, what advice would you give to your 20-something self?

Time goes by faster the older you get, so enjoy your youth. I’m 55 and while I did a lot in my 20s and 30s, I wish I did even more.

Also, don’t let yourself get too far out of shape. It is much easier to maintain than it is to get back into shape if you fall out of shape.

Lastly, some advice someone once told me: Ask yourself every year, Am I making 20% more than I did last year? Do I like the people I work with? And, am I learning things I interested in? If not, consider changing jobs.

Don't get married; you will regret it. And for heaven's sake don't get married again; you will regret that even more.

This advice may not scale.

Don't study psychology it's a trap. If you really want to learn more about humans maybe do acting or anthropology or sales or more meditation/loving kindness.

Study computer science (I kind of accidentally did this).

Don't diversify academically, try to start up a company instead.

Your people skills, while they can be improved, are better than you think. A lot of people tell you that your people skills are bad. They are more wrong than you think, in a lot of cases it's not poor people skills that lead to a lack of good judgement with regards to people. It could be e.g. different value systems.

Meet as many people as you can and assess their energy and who they are in an instant. Become friends with the people you like. You're pretty good at this. Be prepared to let some false negatives (FN) go, maximize meeting truly positive (TP) amazing people.

Increasing dopamine (at D1/D5) in the nucleus accumbens shell increases motivation.

Start taking a multivitamin stack and trying to create a startup ASAP.

401k

Get working on your startups/side projects now, since your university/looking for first job years are those where you've got the most free time. There's a reason so many founders and online creators are uni students; they've got way too much free time, access to a bunch of other bored people in the same situation and none the paycheck related stress associated with a full time job.

Also, learn more about programming. It's not as hard as you may think it is, and the more you know about it, the more possibilities open up for interesting side projects and jobs in the future. God, the amount of things I'd probably have built by now had I really got into programming back in my 20s (or teens).

Then again, you know what? If I was gonna give any advice to my 20 year old self (assuming the course of history didn't change too much), I'd probably be more practical and say:

Get making videos and posting them on YouTube/livestreaming sites, since that's where the money and fame will be in a few years time. People don't care about text as much as they used to.

As well as provide them a nice list of companies to buy stock in for the future.

Learn languages (human languages). Important for mobility. You won't have time to study a language for 2 hours every day later in life.

Build big projects steps by step, 30 minutes every day (code, write a book, run a YT channel). Otherwise you'll wake up at 35 not having build anything significant of your own.

Don't be afraid, take risks, be bold.

Get tech education and study math.

Don't get into debt. Manage your finances carefully. Exercise more and eat healthier. Learn to cook.

I can't stress the part about debt and finances enough.

3 very fast ones that will make a large difference

1) Adopt a learning mindset. There are no failures or wins just opportunities to learn. So, learn from them.

2) Make 1, 5, 10 year life plan, follow it and review it. Any plan is better than none.

3) Open a brokerage account and invest monthly in a s&p 500 fund. Never move it or withdraw from it so 40 years from now you'll be very happy you did.

One last one, have fun! Life seems long but in reality, it's very short.

Guard your health. Your health comes first.

You won't enjoy anything else as well, without your health. And over the medium and long term, you won't accomplish it without your health.

You will be offered, or coerced into, all sorts of compromises. "Future payoff" is a ploy.

Very often, your intuition will warn you before conscious thought catches up.

Try new things because it gives you the opportunity to see your blind spots. If you feel uncomfortable taking action in some area, then that's a good place to start. But also be kind to yourself, and start small. Don't beat yourself up with stories. And finally, unless you get something in your own experience, don't believe it. Opinions are a dime a dozen. Whenever possible, investigate the truth about something yourself. It's much more fun that way :).

Oh yes, and take personal development very seriously, and work towards becoming more aware of who you are at every level. Invest in yourself when you're young, don't be stingy about it. Compounding interest works for personal growth too.

Family is the most important thing, you only realise this when you get old. Respect your parents and love them (tell them you do). Most people you take for granted today in your family won't be around soon, listen to their stories and take care of them.

Kids gave me most happiness. Have them some day.

Choose who you work with very wisely. This is going to change your life most. Choose friends carefully. Once you do, never let sincere friends go away.

Learn how to read. Read a lot. Learn how to write. Write a lot. Experiment a lot. Don't be afraid to fail.

Reach out to people. This will open up new possibilities that you never thought of.

Work on your temperament. People who know how to control their nerves achieve most.

Don't take a lot of stress, it will be mostly fine.

I need to think more, interesting question :)

( I'm 45 now, back into a cubicle for a huge consultancy, my working days feel like payed vacations )

don't bury all your money, time and health trying to be an I.T. entrepreneur in Brazil. Just get a cozy job and enjoy your paychecks...

start a blog. pay off your student loans ASAP and dont go into any more debt ever

You are not defined by your job or pay level, do not become compulsive about the ‘social prestige’ 1 job gives over another

Watch more Sadhguru videos on YouTube to get a better view on life.

Don’t learn java as your first programming language.

Start spreadsheets on a bunch of life areas instead of just scrounging together data every time a form or tax return needs to be filed (job, living location, investments, etc)

From a work perspective:

1. Listen, a lot 2. Understand other's perspectives. For this you need to know exactly what they do and how protective they are of their turf 3. Ask pertinent questions not only to improve your knowledge but also to show your are listening 4. Be prepared to bide your time. Opportunities happen outside of your control but they are coming eventually.

Don't worry too much about what will people think or say about you.

Read more

Stop eating junk food

"you can only connect the dots backwards"

Travel. Then travel more.

I was very financially disciplined in my 20s, but I now wish I had saved a little less and experienced more. Now that I have a family and obligations, it's much harder to go explore.

Try not to let life interfere too much with your self-care habits but remember its ok if it does.

Take time to read and write. (things that aren't code)

Be nicer to people and be there for your friends and family.

Business is about relationships, communication and serving others.

Smile.

- Document / archive everything - Keep a diary - If you have an idea, build around it. A lot of startup started on "nothing"

- not to pursue phd, just get a masters and get a grip on research. - read more and read about your work.

Don't choose a job for the money.

Choose a problem you want to solve, and work on this on the long term.

Don't trust people in suits.

don't sit down in a chair at a hospital while your wife is pregnant

Even elite University education in STEM is a terrible investment. All the people boostering it are recipients of multiple selection filters or from different age cohorts and really have no idea what the fuck they are talking about.

When you do the math - it's terrible compared to almost any other alternative - even minimum wage jobs.

This doesn't apply if you have a wealthy family and can be assured of a job with dad's company or other connections - but for a blue collar kid university is not a good route to fortune in the UK.

The level of effort required and the wages are simply not commensurate and everybody who thinks so is delusional because they're not comparing and contrasting the effort with other options. The stats are all skewed by confounding factors like half your class will be going to work for Goldman Sachs.

Modern universities are a way of manufacturing poor people with stunted ambitions, not upward social mobility.