In Kenya, “sugar” relationships have become both more common and more visible

Please discount the fact that I am a bit of a misanthrope, but... who the hell enters in a relationship not expecting to get something in return?

Thanks to the choice of illustrations, it could definitely use a NSFW tag. But it's a surprisingly good article about a difficult subject. It's very evenhanded and even notes that there are young males who do this as well.

Sex work is a tough topic for sorting out human rights under the best of circumstances. It sounds like it is even more fraught in the crucible that is Africa.

I am an outsider to some extent but it's interesting observing a repeat of the so-called "feminist sex wars" here in Africa. One argument is that if the society was more equal economically across gendered lines, then there would be no need for this kind of sex work. This is often used as an argument against sex work in the west as well, but I'm guessing the level of wealth inequality, and not just across gendered lines, is much more extreme in Kenya, so the scale of the difference could push it into a different regime.

I don't know what the answer is. I also don't like the idea of people on the outside imputing their mores unto another group when that group could advocate for themselves.

FWIW, this is rampant in many parts of Asia, too, with a similar discrepancy between traditional culture (Confucianism in China, Catholicism in the Philippines, Buddhism in Thailand, Islam in Indonesia, ...) and today's realities.

Several young women maintain several distinct social media identities: one for family, one for friends, one for "daddies".

“Transactional sex was once driven by poverty”

Isn’t poverty what drives most of us to get any job? I work because otherwise i’d be in poverty.

Are they implying that sex work is the only work available to them? Unlikely. But I imagine sex work is far more profitable and easier of a job than the alternatives - so maybe that actually makes it a good thing?

Global replace "Kenya" with "USA", the tale still rings true.

>>One of her motives, she says, is to be able to support her younger sisters, so they won't need to rely on men for money

Aha! The very definition of taking one for the team :-) .

The news is that now it's wide open and more expected. They'll keep it doing well into their 40's, once you cross the barrier you can always use more money. And odds are that they'll find a taker, albeit an older one and receive way less money.

I wonder, by the way, whether the surge of this phenomenon is an outgrowth of social media.

In discussions with young women of modest means in countries with limited opportunities and huge income inequality (ie most third world countries), it is hard to find arguments against their impression that this lifestyle is their best chance for a good life.

I'd like to hear of any HNers who are involved in this lifestyle. Given SV pay, it must be not unheard of.

The old huge problem with empowerment rears it's ugly head. The problem is that freedom is liberating for the powerful, and a prison for the poor.

For rich women, the ability to enter into these "sponsor relationships" is empowering, enabling them to do more. And as long as they can just end it on short notice, certainly empowering.

For poor women, who would not be able to eat without a sponsor relationship or outright prostitution, the freedom is a prison, effectively convicting them to lifelong sex work.

This would also work in reverse. Zero tolerance for prostitution is liberating for the poor, oppressive for the rich. Not just for women even, if you consider for a little bit what the effect on men is, it is even liberating for men.

For rich men, of course the ability to just buy women without needing to hide anything is liberating. Even for men who just want to have sex without condoms (often very strongly legislated against in outright sex work, and enforced by the women, for health reasons) it is liberating.

The same is true for many other issues that current society can't seem to make it's mind up over. For, example, for many young girls, the "freedom to wear the islamic face veil" is not freedom at all, because their parents have a very strong preference (and feel justified in using violence to get this particular issue settled). And of course that leads to further oppression.

But for women who are already in a position of sufficient power to just do what they want, whatever comes into their mind, a prohibition on face veils would be limiting.

However, in both examples it is only liberty at the expense of others that is achieved. Usually liberty for the powerful, and usually men at that, at the expense of poorer people, mostly women.

But we should allow this ... because Beyonce used it to achieve great status. And that it failed 99.99% of those who tried it ? Oh well ...

And there is the small issue that there are many more women for whom outlawing prostitution is liberating, where even just outlawing or socially punishing sponsorship relationships would at least provide safe sex and there are many more girls for whom a prohibition on face veils would be liberating, where it would provide a way out of a bad family position, an initial concession to "family oppression/values" that their parents would be forced to make. Because there are simply much more poor ...

Whenever I think about sugar relationship, I always think of the movie 和你在一起 (Together) by Chen Kaige. One of the character was a woman dependent on sugar relationships and her motivations, fears and the relationships she had with those men was very well depicted.

The oldest profession is prostitution. You can find references to it in ancient greek writings, for example.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hetaira

I really wonder what makes a news article like this interesting enough to make it featured in ycombinator news. I mean from the content point of view. Probably interesting to train a classifier. Has anybody tried?

In Kenya, but also in the UsA. Cant believe how many college students become sugar babies to pay college. In the US

I'm not sure what I expected, but some kind of NSFW tag would've been nice :|

Aside: I'd rather have a classic article with images and videos instead of that constant over- and underscrolling, images appearing and disappearing etc. I think the innovation is a bit compulsive.

In the Gulf they take it one step further with their Dubai Porta Potties: https://britmannia.com/2016/07/03/dubai-porta-potties/