So go out, socialize, get away from your bubble, and meet other people.
[0]: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_sex_ratio
Total number of females in the entire population != the number of reproductive aged heterosexual women within my particular socioeconomic level that are single and seeking a relationship. That number is absolutely tiny in comparison. And with even the slightest convolution for racial or looks preference it's down to maybe a few thousand individuals out of millions in a major metro area.
I'd guess also more men than women migrate to the US for work.
Men used to die in large number from war and work, not so anymore.
So here we are.
The ratio of men to women in the US is almost exactly 50/50 (with a slight bias to women!) In fact, that ratio has gone down in favor of women over the years[0], which invalidates your last point. And unless you live in a select few states[1] this holds true.
Instead of there being a secret gender imbalance cover up, it seems much more likely to me that cities with large tech industries (like NYC) are just swimming with sausage.
[0]https://www.census.gov/prod/2001pubs/c2kbr01-9.pdf
[1]https://www.statista.com/statistics/301946/us-population-mal...
For people between 18 and 44, the number of men very closely matches the number of women. So, ignoring polyamory, the the proportion of singles across America must be very gender-equal. Since that shows that the proportion of singles in cities in male-skewed, the proportion of singles elsewhere must be female-skewed.
You can have the same number of men and women and the older women have a hard time finding a man and the young men have a hard time finding a woman.
It makes sense if you think about older men and younger women being able to easily match up and older women and younger men not being able to find anyone.
Even if true, this means nothing w.r.t. men struggling to find women. Like with most other things in life, a few good (looking) men, rich men, charismatic men disproportionately (get to) date several women, whereas most (,not all) women tend to be loyal to 1 guy [1], so that leaves a lot of men with no potential mate...
Natural selection at it's finest.
[1] Because society says that if a man has many women, he is a 'Casanova' / 'Player' whereas if a woman has many men, she's labelled a 'Hoe' / 'Bimbo'. So women, even if they desire to be with more than 1 man at a time, either suppress it, or do it very discretely.
I often wonder if it's society saying it, or if it's reality (e.g. our biology or plain logic) saying it and our society just echoing. For example, society is saying that you should brush your teeth, but science is also saying that, so it's a good thing that society is echoing and amplifying the message.
For the specific example you mentioned, I think it's very likely that society is just echoing what biology is dictating, which is that men have sex/children with as many women as they can, and women to select as good genes for their few children as they can.