I have trouble seeing how it could be placed along the wall while maintaining the necessary tension.
Through rings bolted to the wall.
Good (and in retrospect, obvious) point!
Yeah, I misunderstood things worse: I thought doors opened inwards, and that the ropes were somehow rigid (basically rods).
I suspect the door opening was already close to a wall. Just make sure the hinge is on the side farthest away from the wall.
I think just because thong is a funny word that means different things in different places
The word means a (leather) strap - which is why thong underwear and thong sandals are called "thongs" that's what they're made of ... like rubbers being called rubbers (kinda, note a rubber in en-gb is both an eraser and a prophylactic).