The real problem is poliferation of ads and site owners that "don't care" if sites are hard to load on slow devices and connections. It's not something people really optimize for anymore.
The real problem, which Google tried to "fix" with their dubious AMP program, is that search engines don't punish huge and dog slow websites. Basically every large site is optimized for ads and SEO. Something we wouldn't see if the largest search engine didn't base their business on the same.
If a search engine half as good as Google appears that doesn't tolerate such trash in the search results all these slow sites will go away overnight