Rebel girls and children’s books: In defense of well-behaved women | Hacker News Reader

Rebel girls and children’s books: In defense of well-behaved women

slate.com

14 pointsfanf211 comments

> Parks made history precisely because she was well-behaved, because her image was so wholesome and unthreatening, and her protest stood out as an apparently isolated act of forgivable “misbehavior” in an otherwise virtuous life. She was a much safer heroine than working-class teenager Claudette Colvin, pregnant out of wedlock, who had been arrested for refusing to give up her seat on a Montgomery, Alabama, bus several months earlier

This hits home. Society wants well behaved women -- and men. Heroes they can rally with, not so much. Just people that the average person think are like them, living a vicarious life.

But is that the best for the individual and their unique talents?

Personally, I do not want to glorify submission to any cultural value. I want to forge my own path. While I am sure many men would like well-behaved women, I do not think we ought to become their idealized version of a human being. Likewise, I do not want men to think they have to follow some cultural narrative to 'prove their worth.' They should forge their own path.

I thought we had left these old values in the previous century, but apparently we haven't.

> I thought we had left these old values in the previous century

You are welcome to go forge your own path - but many of us love and cherish "old values" - so why should we follow?

Because those old values lead to the misery and needless deaths of hundreds of thousands of people, for very little benefit.

I agree with you. Proponents of “old values” would argue they come with billion$ of benefit$.

Park had history of activism behind her when she remained sit. And community leaders stood by her, because she had track record to prove she can stand the heat (which came, she had to leave town in the end). She continued to be active afterwards. She was rebel before that one act, but she could be made look nice and unthreatening for political reasons. Had she be so nice and good submissive girl and unthreatening, everything that followed would be much harder.

What she was not is out of control impulsive rebel - she was not lashing randomly, did not risked pregnancy to prove something to herself or out of being coerced by boyfriend. Did not broke law out of lack of impulse control.

It is not just that Park was not teenager. She was also known as someone who won't break under pressure, someone who did activism before and was known in that community.

Good submissive girl would never sit on that bus in the first place.

I think there are three separate issues here. There's the existential, which we all must work out on our own. Then there's political strategy, which "behave until you don't" seems like a good maxim for. Then there's historiography, which is who we collectively decide is a historical or noteworthy figure, in which case, boosting the signals of people like Claudette Colvin can become it's own kind of sociopolitical strategy, and a good one!

My five-year-old is really into the "Rebel Girls" book. Its format -- one page biographies -- makes it easy to flip thru and pick stories.

Unlike almost everything else we read it is both real and edgy.

The one that she returns to the most is Malala, shot in the head by men who didn't like her going to school, won the Nobel peace prize.

If she likes that, may I suggest “She Persisted” [1]. It covers 13 notable American women with short, 1-page stories, artwork, and a quote. My girls like it.

1. She Persisted: 13 American Women Who Changed the World https://www.amazon.com/dp/1524741728/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_OI5l...

"The one that she returns to the most is Malala, shot in the head by fundamentalist Muslim men who didn't like her going to school, won the Nobel peace prize."

Fixed it for you.

Or let me explain: The problem here isn't that they are men in general, but that they follow a set of beliefs - Sharia law - which say that Muslim women only live to please Muslim men. Which also means that they don't like Muslims girls or women to go to school.

“Well-behaved women seldom make history”. I love that quote.

I think it's rather likely that the vast majority of poorly-behaved women also don't make history.

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