Ask HN: What do you want out of social media?

Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, Reddit, etc are all garbage products from my POV for a host of reasons, and I know I'm not the only one that feels the same way.

If you're no longer into any of the existing social media platforms a) how are they failing you, and b) what do you actually want out of social media?

For me personally, I want a way to keep in touch with people/ people to keep in touch with me, but that doesn't sell my data to advertisers and is resistant to virality and toxic behavior.