How is that not a bad experience for a buyer who never got an item he paid for?
The buyer kept emailing me after it, 'updating' me on the situation, which I mostly ignored. I believe he was in some smaller town and he knew the postman and had a very strong suspicion that he stole it, or something like that.
No postal system is without risk; that’s why they offer package insurance, registered post, etc.
Every real merchant who deals with the public at scale accepts this and refunds in such cases. Presumably they eat the cost or THEY purchase insurance for the shipping and roll this into the cost so they don't have to tell customers I'm spending YOUR money on drugs and hookers and don't care if you actually got anything for it.
Such interactions absolutely destroy relationships with customers and the customers bank is likely to issue a charge back to protect their relationship with their customers.
In my personal life on the other hand, I'm regularly prompted at checkout to decide between registered post with insurance, or regular post without. If I opted out of insurance, I wouldn't blame the seller for the package not arriving or any damage (presuming of course that it was packaged appropriately), and I'd fully expect Paypal to resolve in their favour after verifying that the package was actually sent.
It's true that this would ruin the customer relationship which is why some businesses may offer to make things right anyway, but I personally wouldn't expect it.
That said, the consumer protection laws in my country (Australia) are fairly strong so I may well be entitled to redress; this is just my personal attitude.