“Children are expensive”
https://fred.stlouisfed.org/series/DSPIC96
Note that the real definition of "disposable income" just means income after taxes. Since housing costs come out of disposable income, and housing costs have been increasing far faster than income, you are not actually on base.
Meanwhile, as the young prospective parents work harder than ever to save for children, the government claims that they aren't producing enough new citizens to keep the welfare state going. This is taken as justification for bringing in immigrant labor. This suppresses wages for everyone, making saving and reproducing harder.
No, I don't believe the free market is a zero-sum game. But it's not exactly free either.
1. People want their own house, 2 cars, ....
2. So they work more, to earn more.
3. In some cases you need to study more, to get better job.
4. Women also get involved in this shitty loop.
5. Getting loans are easier now. However housing supply is not sufficient. So prices go higher.
6. People end up working/studying more, because they need even more money now.
7. They end up having 1 child.
8. Now, since government wants more workers (1 child is not sustainable), they have to bring immigrants.
9. It is getting dangerous now. Corporations lobby politicians, to keep minimum wages at a very low level.
10. Ambitious immigrants are ready to work like a horse. (Don't feel offended, I'm also an immigrant)
11. Corporations bully current employees to work more, since if you don't work more, there is an immigrant out there to replace you.
12. People have to work even more to satisfy their employers.
13. Go to 1.
With respect to real estate, I would suggest that the government at least stop pouring fuel on the fire. End all real estate tax subsidies, including mortgage interest tax deductions. End all government real estate loan guarantees. End any favorable tax treatment of real estate as an asset.
On the supply side, the government should greatly curtail restrictions on property development. I think some concern about the quality of housing is justified, but nearly all zoning should be eliminated.
The push for immigration is, in my opinion, coming primarily from the private sector who then "donates" to government to do their bidding. The reason is, as you mention, to drive down wages. This is likely even the reason for the push of trying to get more women into computer science. There's no shortage of developers, but there's also not an extreme surplus as there is for many other jobs. Getting more women in the field would stand to potentially near double the labor force which would enable companies to sharply cut wages. And conveniently it also sounds like a socially progressive movement and so companies work to undermine a labor force while getting cheered on by that same labor force for doing so.
Anyhow, these problems will ultimately only be solved when we stop pretending that 95% of this country doesn't exist. That goes for employee, entrepreneur, and venture capitalist alike.