That IMHO seems to be as much of a taboo as having depression itself for a lot of people... it's hard to convince someone that depression is seriously real, and equally hard to convince people [affected by their loving one's] depression is not like terminal cancer.
It's indeed possible to get near normal, but it's very hard to convey to someone in such pains.
Rationality also goes out of the window when emotion storms strike. Even though I knew that the previous day I was alright, if the next I go down, it's not always enough to help me go through the bad times.
ps: also give pills a chance, they might not work, but it might lessen your load tremendously and avoid further damage.
You don't forget what it's like to start to suffocate in the abyss.
You don't forget what it's like to know that dying is easier than any other option available to you and that it's a blink of an eye away.
It scars you
We equate openly suicidal people to attention seekers because they talk about it without doing it. Facing that disbelief was one of the things that scarred me the most.
https://smile.amazon.com/Anatomy-Epidemic-Bullets-Psychiatri...
The importance of connection and trust, at least from my experience, cannot be stressed enough.
Empirical evidence has indeed proven that there are many cases of depression which are rooted in chemical imbalances or physical abnormalities and can't be cured by shifting one's thinking patterns. But that represents a portion, not a rule or even a majority of cases.
It's frustrating and saddening to try and help someone when they deeply believe that they can't be helped.