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Comment by agoodthrowaway | Hacker News Reader

I grew up poor in PA. People who have never been poor are not prepared to hear about it. My wife doesn’t even want to hear about it. She’ll roll her eyes when I talk about it. The fact is that people can’t relate to an empty refrigerator or to not having money to buy a gallon of milk.

Poverty is soul crushing.

I have had a very successful and influential engineering career but I can look back at single decisions I made that could have sent me the other direction. It’s easy for people to say that the decision I made was obvious but it absolutely wasn’t at the time. I took huge risk being the first in my family to go to a prestigious University and double major in physics and mathematics in the early 90s(I was no prodigy); let alone go to graduate school.

One decision different and I’d be driving trucks in West Virginia.

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I think this thread overestimates how much people care. Social and virtue signaling mean people have to be sympathetic when it's brought up, but I don't think most people actually care. Anyone who struggles wants their struggles to mean something, but the world doesn't care.

They don't care. I'm going to destroy them and laugh. And then help them rebuild their lives because I'm a nice person. But sorry, they need to suffer, even just a little.

To clarify I'm only going to destroy them because they coast. You can't coast when you're working for that milk money. God having milk is so good.

A nicer take: there should be mandatory class mixing. Rich kids should have to spend a few months being poor as part of their education. I'm not sure the other way around really helps anything but it'd be a nice break for the poor kid.

> I think this thread overestimates how much people care.

I think you have it backwards. People are not naturally sociopathic; psychologically healthy people naturally care about other people. They may have limited resources to act, but that's a different issue.

As evidence of caring, people widely support social welfare programs. In most wealthy countries (and some others), everyone has healthcare on the taxpayer's dime, as well as other services such as housing. Even the U.S. spends vast amounts of money on these things. People also care about the rights and wellbeing of others worldwide; the trendy nationalism may try to argue against it, but Western democracies have been spending blood and treasure on others' freedom and prosperity for generations. (They spent those things on many sins too.)

People support social welfare programs, but they usually don't want it in their face. Given the opportunity to do something in person, most people crumble and go about their lives as usual. It's a very rare person that takes action.

> they usually don't want it in their face.

We don't have a basis for talking about motives. I'd say people are scared and uncomfortable with what seems foreign to them.

> Given the opportunity to do something in person, most people crumble and go about their lives as usual. It's a very rare person that takes action.

Many people give money to those asking for it. Many will say that they are overwhelmed and feel like they can't help everyone (tip: don't let the great be enemy of the good: don't worry about helping everyone; if you can, help someone). Many have their own problems and reasons.

I can't remember speaking to someone who says they just don't care.

Yep completely agree. Had spent time "homeless" as a child, middle class as a teen, and then actually homeless during (very) early adulthood. Additionally some of my best friends parents are multi millionaires so I've seen the range.

Most peers talk a good game but they can't relate and don't truly care. Its hard for me to at times as well...

Of course I would never even bring any of this up IRL, not worth the conversation.

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