There is a qualitative change in when you are busy for the vast majority, though. Most people don't have a job where at any minute you have to drop everything and perform some task. This being HN, a very above-average number of the people who do have a job of that nature are around here, of course, but I'd expect it's still a majority of people of baby-having age around here who are not routinely getting paged at 2am by their job.

As a non-parent I do get this sentiment--certainly there can be many important things beyond children that call our time--however as someone who has dated someone with a kid and seen the kind of time and energy a child demands, OP's statement is spot on.

It's more of a paradigm shift in the way you think about time -- you're suddenly not just responsible for yourself and your accompanying todos, but a whole nother human life, and their accompanying todos (which are manifold greater because they're dependent on you for even the simplest of needs).

> Parents don’t own being busy or stretched for time.

Didn't say that. I was saying something to my past self who thought I was busy at the time which was the point of all this.

And, no, you're not in full control of how busy you are when you're a parent. You have kids? Because no parent I know would ever say that.

Being a parent doesn't mean you're an unequivocal martyr to humanity (such is the caricature) but there are unique demands to being a parent re:time.