Well, even saying no in a particular tone of voice can be accepted as a scolding, especially if the tone is in higher notes. What is a particular tone of voice, which will not effect them in a way that scolding does? They are not human and cannot express their minds, which makes it more complicated to understand whether you crossed the line or not. I remember talking to the kid the other day and saying no to something in a very calm but firm way, she said I was scolding her and didn't understand why I would do that. I hope it does complement my point.

I didn't disagree with the fact that it is the ideal way of raising them, but sometimes being strict wouldn't hurt if the other methods don't work. And by being strict I don't mean being violent and beating them, since I am not a violent person by nature.