Love == Trust -- or we really disagree about love, so much in fact, we might as well use different words.
Simple counterexample: An aged parent with severe Alzheimers. Maybe it's not OK for them to have unfettered access to the car.
You want oversight/control/verification because you love them, not despite it.
For me, love is multi-faceted and can’t be defined as a single attribute like trust. People love food that literally kills them. You don’t always get to choose whom or what you love.
Yes you may. I have 3 (8-9-12). I don't "trust" them to not eat candy that I said they shouldn't eat, but I do trust them not to kill me in my sleep -- which is what trust is about (IMHO).
In fact I think I trust them more than I love them, and I love them a lot. But sometimes I'm upset with them. Being upset or angry doesn't affect trust.
Trust is a kind of binary quality that is either on or off; it may be too strong to say that love == trust, but I really can't imagine how I could love someone without trusting them.
1. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stanford_marshmallow_experimen...
I just can't imagine not loving my kids even if I knew I could not trust them. Another example would be family with mental illness to such a degree you may actually fear they will kill you in your sleep, but hopefully they would be placed in a safer environment and still have their families love and support.
The case of mental imparemeent is interesting and I had not considered it. It would be possible to argue that the person isn't there anymore if they're crazy, and there needs to be someone to exercise love against. I'm not sure.
Also, maybe persons with mental illnesses could be trusted more in our society.
OK, so if love is unconditional, then what about situations where you love them but they hate you? If it's unconditional love, then you love them regardless of their feelings towards you.
What do you do if your kid is an actual psychopath and doesn't love you. Do you still love them unconditionally? Would you trust them with the keys to the gun safe?
What do you do if you have an adult child that has made some really bad life choices and is spiraling out of control addicted to hard drugs? Do you still love them (unconditional, right)? Do you trust them with the keys to your alcohol cabinet? The details to your bank account?
Love != trust.
There are some situations where if you truly love someone you do not extend them trust (because they will abuse it regardless of your love for them).
http://research.bmh.manchester.ac.uk/cmhs/research/centrefor...
Page 5:
> xx. In all four UK countries, most patients convicted of homicide also have a history of alcohol or drug misuse, between 88% in England and 100% in N Ireland. In other words it is unusual for mental health patients to commit homicide unless there is a coexisting problem of substance misuse.
https://www.drugabuse.gov/publications/research-reports/como...