I'm not going to say it doesn't suck.

Unrequited love sucks. Losing an election sucks. Being kicked out of a community sucks. Losing your job sucks.

Doesn't matter if you "deserve" it or not. Still sucks.

Maybe it sucks more when there's malice in the revelation, than if someone just sent an email to the wrong mailing list or if two people unexpectedly ran into each other somewhere neither expected the other to be.

But the bell has been rung. What do you want people to do, to treat their feelings like jurors, "that evidence has been obtained improperly, you are instructed to disregard it."?