I was sexually assaulted at Equinox and banned for reporting it | Hacker News Reader

I was sexually assaulted at Equinox and banned for reporting it

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196 pointspain_perdu31 comments

> Three weeks after I’d sent Equinox a request for assistance, I received a call from a senior global executive. Without an ounce of compassion, he told me I was banned from Equinox — that, as a private gym, they had the right to cancel my membership for any reason, and they’ve decided to terminate mine.

I bet this came from the legal department. It seems blunt (and it is), but the rationale would be something like, "This guy got assaulted, we may be liable for something, let's keep him away so we don't make things worse until its settled.". Not so much victim blaming as covering your ass going forward.

> In my view, this is deplorable. As the major leading fitness brand, Equinox should never take this kind of approach in dealing with customers. I’ve paid over $10,000 in fees over the past two years, and I did not deserve to be treated so disrespectfully by the instructor, and I do not know why I should have been banned. For Equinox to cancel my membership, to ban me from the gym for no apparent reason only feeds a culture of victim-blaming.

$10K for a gym membership over two years?! That over $416/month. Is that normal for the area?

$416/month is higher than I pay, but I have been an Equinox member for years, and yes, it is very expensive. I started going when I was in SV working at a tech company that paid 50% of my dues. Currently, I pay $180 CAD/month right now, plus another $90 CAD/month for a dedicated locker with laundry service.

It's expensive, and I could certainly get a cheaper membership elsewhere. But it fits perfectly into my daily routine, and is part of why I've lost 40 lbs over the last 3 months, so for me, it's a worthwhile expense.

If he was sexually assaulted and they're banning him to cover their own ass, that's way worse than victim blaming as it suggests they are aware the victim is not at fault yet they punish the victim anyway. An economic incentive does not excuse immoral acts. It's disgusting how quick people are to defend this kind of behavior. Anyone who was involved in making that decision is a worthless piece of shit.

I always find it sad when an explanation of the reasoning behind some immoral behavior is treated like a justification or defense. I find it sad because it discourages understanding opinions you disagree with, and because I think that understanding is important. If Equinox acted that way simply because they are an evil corporation, nothing could be done about it; but if they followed an economic incentive, then changing the incentive structure can prevent that kind of behavior in the future.

Very few people harm others because they're simply "evil", this type of cartoon evil is not really common if it even exists.

Harming others for selfish reasons is practically the definition of "evil" in the real world. So all involved are evil.

Sadism is more common than you're supposing IMO, but agreed that incentive based "evil" is probably more common.

Also if Equinox followed and an economic incentive by banning the guy even though he's a victim, he should perhaps return the favour by suing them for some large sum even though the problem probably wasn't really their fault. Such are the wonders of the legal system.

They are evil though. They harmed someone and instead of making good for it they only protect themselves. There is no "both sides" to this.

Equinox is a luxury gym so it is very expensive. Private trainers are also expensive in the area. Generally in range $150-$500 per session (sometimea discount for a package).

I am not really a big fan of gym membership unless my company sponsors one. I have bad experiences with a few gyms... and every cancellation camr with a one-month deposit cancellation fee...

> $10K for a gym membership over two years?! That over $416/month. Is that normal for the area?

I'm not sure what area he's in, but he's probably including the cost of classes, trainers or similar.

I was a member of Equinox in WeHo & then Santa Monica. This was a while ago, so if I remember correctly, I think I paid ~$150/month. When I used a personal trainer, it was about $1k for 10 sessions.

There are 24 Hour Fitness, Bally's & the like in the area and they're more modestly priced. Probably $30/month.

The biggest difference comes down to how long you have to wait. If you go to Bally's after work, you're probably going to wait for cardio. At Equinox, I could show up at 5:30pm and typically get on a bike or treadmill. Occasionally there would still be a wait, but probably a few minutes.

The equipment itself wasn't that different. Nor were the other facilities. Equinox is a /little/ nicer in atheistics & the locker room, but that's about it.

The WeHo location did have the added kick of it wasn't uncommon to see someone reasonably famous. For whatever reason, I overlapped with Fabio's workout a lot. Not enough to exchange names, but enough that we would give each other a familiar hello nod. I also also was once during curls & looked over to see Jay Z on the bench. What I first noticed were people acting odd (they were bodyguards I later assumed). Apparently Beyonce was there as well, but I didn't see her myself.

I regularly went to a gym in Jakarta and tried the massage service since it's cheap compared to the western. One of the masseurs was male and I confirm with the author that it's hard for heterosexual men to perceive subtle actions taken by gay instructors/masseurs. Initially you attribute certain behaviors to cultural differences but luckily I realized why the masseur kept asking to continue selling his service to me. It felt very awkward for me too and obviously I skipped any future massage in that gym. I give my respect to the male author about speaking up. You can see easily how dumb some of the commenters are in this thread failing to recognize the value of that article.

Kudos to the author for reporting the incident and going to the police. That there turned out to be video of the whole incident was very fortuitous and it sounds like the police have a copy now.

The instructor was fired. Presumably the ex-instructor is being charged with a crime? That part is missing from the story.

As to being punished for speaking up -- the gym terminated the authors membershhip because it seems to me that the author has an open/shut civil lawsuit against the gym, and they are expecting to get sued? I assume it's easy to find lawyers who would take this on contingency and probably reach a quick settlement.

I'm sorry that happened to you and thanks for speaking up. The way the company treated you is beyond awful.

This looks like the Equinox Pine Street location (in the FiDi), not the Equinox Sports Club on Market Street. Not that it matters for the story, but the headline's off target.

The actual story is pretty fucked up, though.

Amazingly, a comment below was critical of “writing an erotic novel on medium”, yet to me it was so non-erotic I couldn’t even understand the mechanics of the assault. Was this intercourse, touching? I guess he’s damned if he makes it too detailed and damned if he doesn’t.

Separately there’s a thread about Equinox protecting business interests. Even if that’s true it sounds like a double standard, I would bet they would not think they could get away with stonewalling so much if the victim were a vulnerable looking woman.

I'm sure I'm going to get heavily flagged for this, but even as written from the complainant's PoV, the ambiguous nature of consent (i.e. as it happens in the real world, not in the law books) - must it be verbal, can be it simple acquiescence in a non-coercive setting - jumped out at me. I would not be surprised if the yoga instructor genuinely believes, even if mistakenly, this was consensual. I hope this comment isn't construed as victim blaming or trying to make light of what was a scarring experience for someone, and I certainly don't think Equinox staff handled it well.

That story reads like a trolling/parody to me. Read also sarcasm_heals's comment (https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=15471817) which was, unfortunately, downvoted to death.

This has 100 votes after one hour. It has no connection to technology. It's an unverified post on medium. And the punishment referred to in the headline is that the $5000/yr membership to his gym was cancelled.

Meanwhile, discussions of women' discrimination, in the tech sector, from reputable sources are flagged as fast as possible. C. f.: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=15267221

I agree with you about the questionable nature of this post's popularity on Hacker News and also question its validity. I am confident that many others would agree.

There are many other relevant stories that fail to rise through the ranks here, not just the one you mentioned.

That happens 24 hours a day and has been happening for 10 years on this site. Why does this story seem so absurd and unjustified to you? Why does this topic bring out such crazy reactions to it? It's weird to see in action.

Stories about men who've been the victim of sexual assault are often buried and silenced. Please don't try to do that.

It's likely this must be "an unverified medium post" because the media and the authorities often ignore these stories.

Why do you think the parent comment is trying to silence anyone? To me it just seems like they’re providing evidence of a hypocritical attitude here.

I think the comment is trying to silence the story because of the criticisms of the story, like "unverified" and the attempt to minimize the "punishment referred to in the headline".

>Ellen Pao

It left in my memory as a woman without [edit:]specific sense of humor who was not welcome to “the club”, pretending it is because of her sex. She made millions of dollars on the way with no hard work, and to regular citizen like me it seems like strangest complaint. I’m male and I’m not in my company’s men’s club too — people are different to the extent they may positively tolerate each other, but not make friends. That’s my subjective view. I may have mistaken it with another case, sorry then.

This case is direct sexual assault and Uber-y company is covering the evidence, and the latter is the question in focus. How is it related to?

Stories that get flagged are often hearsay and depend on the particular individual interpretation of events (e.g. "is he a creep or just awkward?" and "is he a sexist or just an asshole to everyone?").

The next time a woman's sexual assault is captured on tape, repressed by a large corporation, and ignored by the media, I'm pretty sure it wouldn't be flagged.

Well, this was flagged now, too.

It has no connection to technology.

Having a connection to technology is not a requirement for HN stories.

Why did this get flagged?

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