This is hilarious. Any chance of expanding this to other institutions? E.g. maybe you can charge parents $20 a month to send their kids a rejection letter from Harvard every day.
Manuscripts, jobs, medical diagnoses.
Receiving regular rejections for dates, might have a chance to reduce poor handling of real rejections, perhaps even reduce violence towards women.
Either you'll end up being a tank that can handle any negative outcome with grace, or the sheer depression of all the rejection will force you to cancel the service at which point your normal life will feel like a fantasy land where anything is possible.