I think your copy could use some improvement. Casual professional is a hard tone to do well.
Also, this should be a single call for a user where you give me all of the users feature flags. Then I can put it in a session cache and be done with it. These things by design never change for a given user.
This is not a technically difficult thing to do (until you reach scale) so I think you will get more return from investing in marketing than development.
Gl.