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Recruiter: We're looking for someone to fix the pipes.

You: Yes, I'm a qualified plumber and can do the job.

Recruiter: Sure, but can you fix our pipes?

You: Off course, that is is what I was trained to do.

Recruiter: You keep saying you're a plumber but we need someone to fix our pipes

You: I can do it.

Recruiter: we need someone who have worked with pipes.

You: I have worked with those.

Recruiter: Sure, but we need someone to fix our pipes.

etc

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So it says here you've worked with pipes in large commercial buildings and small residential buildings.

But this position is primarily for pipes in park bathrooms. Do you have any experience with that type of pipe?

Please draw a triangle with 2 perpendicular lines.

Please sir, we are trying to hire an expert here!

Would you accept one drawn on a sphere?

Only if you can show that there are three coordinate-independent vertices.

Give me a sphere and I'll do it!

Two parallel lines though....

Actually, any right triangle is "a triangle with 2 perpendicular lines"...

Get out of here, Pythagoras! :D

Thinks to self: "I'm sure I must have I laid pipe in a park and in a bathroom at some point back in high-school. Regardsless, I'm an f-ing plumber, I can figure it out. If I couldn't figure out crap like that I wouldn't be a plumber in the first place. I'll just tell them what they want to hear."

Replies: "Yes, I have experience with pipe in that setting."

Which is why you need to see this is an inane game, and just "beat it" and move on.

Recruiter: We're looking for someone to fix the pipes.

(re-word their statement/question in your answer so there can be NO ambiguity)

You: I have lots of experience fixing many kinds of pipes, (including the EXACT SPECIFIC kind you asked for - WORD FOR WORD.)

(Notes on your replies, they didn't ask if you are a qualified plumber, they didn't ask what you were trained to do)

This here is the right answer for situation.

Of course, depending on your objective: if your objective is to have at least the option of interviewing further for this company, it helps to remember the concept of Pyrrhic victories: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pyrrhic_victory, i.e.: don't win the battle and lose the war.

Alternatively, don't fucking apply to this kind of company. They have BILLIONS of dollars in the bank (let that sink in for a moment) and the technical recruiters are paid well anyway, there is absolutely no reason for them to not give at least a timid shit about the quality of the people who are the first line of interaction with potential employees.

I interviewed at Google 3 times and I'm currently going through the interviews for the 4th time (a combination of bad interviewers and me being a total idiot), and this time I've stumbled across the nicest technical recruiter I've ever seen in 7yrs in the industry. She actively fought for me after a poor performance, and went above and beyond to accommodate me. And all my previous 3 recruiters at Google were extremely "professional-nice" and rather intelligent. In contrast, every single interaction I had with Facebook left a bad taste in my mouth (mostly getting rejected 2 times with a 5 line email, after being referred by Fb employees).

TL;DR stop enabling companies to be shitty

I was also thinking along the same lines for unpaid internships.

Companies have billions in the bank, make tens of billions profit each year, and have "staff" working who they don't pay a cent to.

The fact there are no laws against that is evil.

Facebook interns are paid, and paid quite well.

It is, in fact, illegal to not pay an intern in the state of California if the intern performs beneficial work.

Your entire rant is predicated on untrue assumptions.

Why do I continually hear the term "unpaid intern".

I believe there is more to the US than just California, right?

> Why do I continually hear the term "unpaid intern".

Because those things still exist, just not doing employer-sponsored g work in for-profit firms.

> I believe there is more to the US than just California, right?

Yes, and unpaid interns doing work that directly benefits the employer is a violation of rules under the Fair Labor Standards Act in the whole US, not just California.

> It is, in fact, illegal to not pay an intern in the state of California if the intern performs beneficial work.

It's illegal in the whole US: https://www.dol.gov/whd/regs/compliance/whdfs71.htm

Thank you, good to know. I limited my claim to California as that was the scope of my certainty.

> The fact there are no laws against that is evil.

Except that is not a fact, at least in the US.

A more apropos version:

Recuiter: we need someone who can work with copper and pex pipes. Your resume says that you work with PEX

You: I can do plumbing. I have connected PEX to copper before.

Recruiter: Do you have experience installing copper?

You: Building codes allow you to substitute PEX for copper pipe. I have used PEX with copper.

Recruiter: we need someone to work with copper. Thank you.

To me, the problem (in part) seems to be that the recruiter is not qualified to understand, or at least cannot clearly communicate, whether they actually need someone who has worked specifically with copper or whether they want general experience with pipes such as copper and pex.

Recruiter: We need someone who knows apropos is an adverb, and won't use it where they probably want 'appropriate'.

I remember in about 1998 seeing a job ad for a dev with 7 years of Java. Yeah good luck with that one! I'm sure they found someone willing to put that on their CV.

The first several years were probably IT operations for a company that has something to do with coffee.

Good one! Sounds like a Monty python skit!

I would add that in this case they wanted someone with 'clay' pipes experience. He only had 'regular' pipes knowledge.

The thing is, in your context, materials do matter; there are enourmous differences between material x and y, eg. a metal pipe and a plastic pipe. Different structural capabilities, different resistance towards chemicals, etc., so if you do need clay pipes experience, because of the very special material that is about to flow in it, or due to structural/pressure/etc specialities, you may actually be in the need of someone who knows these.

There aren't that many differences in software and they are easier to learn (eg. be aware of `killall` linux vs bsd).

In this case though I doubt they were looking for a specialist; it would have been marked as, for example, AS/400 experience if this was the case.

You must be the life of the party in every social gathering! I understand what you mean, my example was not very good...

This guy has a better analogy (and funnier) then mine:

http://www.jasonbock.net/jb/News/Item/7c334037d1a9437d9fa650...

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