"But if you use a rigid ruler, all of its atoms would hold on to one another tightly (with electromagnetic forces), and the ruler would stay the same length, allowing you to notice that more space was created."

This is the part that I don't really understand - how does the electromagnetic force "know" the true distance?

Basically, there is an equation that determines the strength of the field that depends on the distance from the centre of the particle, or rather the "particle" creates a ripple in the field. The ripple still has a length though.

So, the question then becomes - somehow the fact that the field has a bigger differential between two spots in space, keeps from more "space" appearing between those two spots.

Yet where the field is zero (or whatever the lowest energy value is) more space can be created within the field. So, it seems that there is a "space field" and a number of other fields, that interact with each other and can influence the properties of each other.

This kind of makes sense, essentially if the "space field" can have values attached to it, that in effect would determine "distance" from our perspective, then the interactions with other fields can influence the change in distances.

IANAP, so if you are, would this be a correct line of thinking?