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Wait a second. You and your wife pulled in ~$30K per month pre-tax, so I'll be generous and say $15K per month after tax. Any you have never been more broke? Even with kids I'd be hard pressed to call that broke unless you had ridiculous student loans. And in that case, you're screwed where ever you live.

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That's what I was thinking too. If your mortgage on your 3br in Oakland is $1MM, your payment is $4,728/mo (interest portion is tax deductible but let's ignore that). Let's say your place is $1.5MM, that's another $1500 in property tax (also tax deductible but again, let's ignore). If you're bringing home $15K/mo, then you're still left with ~9K per month. That's a lot of rice and beans.

yeah, ridiculous student loans (med school), and some of it is definitely unrelated to being in the bay - a lot of debt related to the substandard paid maternity/paternity leave when having a kid in the USA (shoulda got that job @ netflix in retrospect...).

but kid-related costs here are also out of control, accredited infant daycare is insane, and you pretty much have to take what you can get into. same with after school care. this alone is >$3k/mo.

CA self-employment tax is nothing to sneeze at either, especially if you're a contractor in an industry that makes having an s-corp unfeasible.

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