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seejay

Holly crap! Congratulations woman!!!

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We detached this subthread from https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=14031769 and marked it off-topic.

OP is a man.

I see, how am I supposed to know that? is it listed anywhere in HN?

Reasonable assumption to make for someone named Gabe?

Yes, I'm very sorry for not being an expert in foreign names HN. Thank you.

Yeah, that's fair enough.

I know a couple of women named Gabe. I think that assumption could be misleading.

Why make an assumption at all? Why did you need a pronoun there? Particularly a gendered one?

I don't understand the minus points here. Did I piss a bunch of people off?

I genuinely loved OPs comment here (gave it an upvote). So instead of saying "woman" here If I just "assumed" he is a man and said congratulations "man" or "bro" would I get plus points?

Why make an assumption at all?

You might have omitted "woman".

Your comment, although well-meaning, also didn't add anything to the conversation. People tend to vote those down.

Thank you very much! in that case I'd be ok with the down votes. But the first reply I got here from someone I assume who is in charge of HN was "OP is a man" so I can't help but wonder what's really going on in the minds of these down voters.

1) Your comment added nothing, but then this wasn't a high-value thread anyway.

2) Any pronoun in that case would be superfluous. "Holy crap! Congratulations!" would be far more intuitive to native english speakers. Choosing to add a gendered pronoun without knowing the correct gender is just... odd. That's exactly the type of situation most would avoid where possible: you omit gendered pronouns unless you know.

I agree with both your points, completely. Thank you very much!

You've derailed this thread without adding anything substantial. HN usually frowns on that. Also though, your comment came off as political.

Just drop off the woman (or man) part and you are fine. What's weird, as a native speaker, is your use of woman in this context. It's just odd: it's unnecessary and it adds gender where it isn't appropriate.

Ha, yeah, I'm a man. I think if people knew you're not a native speaker they'd have cut you more slack. While "man" can be used in an informal and friendly way ("congratulations man!" wouldn't have raised any eyebrows), "woman" doesn't work that way. Instead, it comes across as sexist, since the only time you hear it is a chauvinistic man bossing a woman around ("dammit, woman, get over here!"). I admit it doesn't make sense, but there's English for ya.

Haha first of all. Let me apologize to you. And I truly admire how you took it very lightly as oppose to the reactions I got from some police officers (Not the nice human beings who kindly explained things) here in HN.

And I think I owe you an explanation of what happened.

1) I read your super awesome story. (nerdgasm).

2) Upvotes instantly but fuck this is some really good storytelling so just adding an upvote without a smart comment on your achievement would be almost rude!

3) Adds a pun intended "holy crap" (It's TBL people, if that ain't holy crap I don't know what it is!)

4) Genuinely wanting to congratulate you, ends my "smart" comment with a "Congratulations man!".

5) Realizes that I just "assumed" you were a gentleman, which I (we, most people) do a little too much.

6) Knowing I would have gotten away with calling you "man" without looking rude for assuming you were a gentleman, decides if I should do it the other way. (Story of my life)

7) Does it and the rest, as they say, is history.

Thanks,

Your English comes across as over the top to me, and my children don't appreciate you using swear words. Calm down.

Please send my sincere apologies to your children.

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