> The most important for me is directing social conversations.
You want the manager to micro-manage a happy hour? Sounds like torture.
You want the manager to micro-manage a happy hour? Sounds like torture.
And what about people who choose not to go to restaurants?
Seems like you have a chip on your shoulder about drinking.
Sounds like you have a chip on your shoulder about people who don't participate in American drinking culture and binge drinking.
I sit out the usual Friday bar nights and have to turn down the occasional offers of alcohol from coworkers that don't interact with me frequently (and thus either don't know or have forgotten that I don't drink)
They get to go get wasted at the local bar. I get to enjoy my Friday night playing video games alone. Win-win. If they do something like GoKarting I get dragged into something I'd rather not be doing since I feel obliged to attend since I sit out of the many alcohol-related events.
I'm agreeing with Chris2048 here. Sounds like a chip. They can enjoy their alcohol without me being a downer about it or forcing the majority of the company to comply with my wishes of non-alcoholic expenditures.
If they have fun drinking, let them have fun I say. I'll go home and play some video games.
Perhaps it is because I have a very visible impact on my department or maybe because all decision making is done during office hours. The bar is for play and karaoke - not to talk about work. The company culture treats any work discussion during team outings as taboo. You won't be punished for it but you'll be told kindly to shut up and have fun - work will be back again next Monday. Talk about it then. :)
If I had to guess, that probably plays a huge part into why the company doesn't have those sort of problems.
Many places are not like this.
If you deserve promotion for a non-social role, but aren't because you don't go out with the team, that is not good, but that's a tangent to banning work related drinking events.
Another question is, do you go to non-alcohol related work events?
My answer is it's a rarity, and a distraction that you included it.
> Sounds like you have a chip on your shoulder about people who don't participate in American drinking culture and binge drinking.
Does it? Strange given I neither binge drink (which isn't the same as a drink after work anyway, and so I reiterate that you have a chip) nor am I American.
I couldn't care less if people don't want to participate, I'm not going to suggest they be forced - unlike your suggestion that people be forced not to.
When your team visits this hypothetical restaurant, will you ban anyone from ordering steaks, because because a baby can't chew it...
Okay, make me unhappy. I'm just another toxic male. I can go, right? My leaving will just make the rest of the team more vibrant or whatever.
Well, I produce 10x more code than the rest of the team put together, so good luck.
It sounds like you are a very intelligent and motivated person , so lets think about this logically.
Here's an alternative scenario: lets say you take the time and effort to get your team to like you and inspire them to improve to your skill level. If you are the 10x engineer, then produce code at 1x and spend the other 9x learning and doing what it takes to inspire the rest of the team to get to your productivity. If it takes the team 1 year to get to your productivity and the team has size of 10, then the team collectively will have 100x productivity by the end of the year. You would be able to accomplish way more than what you could have accomplished yourself. (Obviously, I generalized the math. But you get the point).
Counter argument: "I don't plan to stay in the company for that long to reap the benefits"
Fortunately, if you inspire somebody to become 10x the person they were, you would have made a lasting impact in their lives. Companies come and go, but relationships stick around. If you leave to do your startup, chances are these 10x engineers would be more than happy to join (at various stages of success during the life of the startup).
This is all I have time to write. I hope this helps. Good luck.