How to REALLY Avoid Living a Life of Quiet Desperation | Hacker News Reader

How to REALLY Avoid Living a Life of Quiet Desperation

artofmanliness.com

27 pointssushobhan13 comments

Sorry but had to stop reading when the author assumed without question that the idea of a man taking a picture of himself on a private jet with women he presumedly bought and thinking objectifying and showing them off as auxiliary objects along with the other items he obtained through some form of wealth was "incongruous" with a quiet life of desperation. I know men like this and they are some of the most insecure and miserable men I know.

Alot of it has to do with the fact that when you view women as objects you can buy and auxiliary items to throw into a picture for decoration on top, it can be very difficult for men like this to actually engage with an intelligent woman or have a meaningful intimate relationship. If that doesn't sound like a life of quiet desperation, I really don't know what does.

Not sure we are reading the same text. It merely says Thoreau is paraphrased in different context that he had originally in mind. The context is incongruous, and following paragraphs actually agree with you.

I don't see why these women can't be intelligent, but I agree with the correlation between insecurity and misery and shallow hedonistic behavior.

The question is irrelevant, they could all have Phds in deep learning and transistor design. But that doesnt seem to be the reason this man is depicting himself as validated in this portrayal. Anyways, I almost regret making this comment because of all the feedback. Sorry I pointed out the authors specific comments on how he DOES NOT see a correlation between the depiction of a man who shows off wealth and women as a quiet life of desperation.

As for me, the loudest and most pompous people in the room I always question their security and happiness the most. If you are so happy, why do you need to show it off to everyone else? Do you need validation from people? That's kind of my initial reaction to men like this.

As far as hedonistic behavior. I really have no opinions on what two (or more if that floats your boat) people do as long as its consensual. The issue was not whether the fact of having a jet or flying in one is wrong, or having around multiple women in bikinis on your jet flights is wrong or shallow or hedonistic, the issue is why show it off to everyone? what are you trying to prove?

Desperation = maybe seeking self validation from other people or these things which in their own form are fine and all but not going to help with your quiet life of desperation and they certainly don't antiquate the possibility of it, which is exactly what his author seemed to not understand.

I read this example as being a stereotypical shallow "aspiration" that is packaged up and sold as being fulfilling in modern culture. The author even points this out:

> Anyone with even a pretty cursory understanding of Thoreau’s life and philosophy knows that such a hedonistic, materialistic, jet-setting lifestyle isn’t exactly what he had in mind with that line.

Given that the article follows up with analysis and praise of Thoreau's approach to finding joy in the day-to-day and taking new, more curious and imaginative perspectives on our everyday surroundings, I hardly think the author is propping up this initial stereotypical example as being a positive role model.

actually, per the first paragraph he specifically says he thinks the depiction is incongruous with the quiet life of desperation and the relationship between the two is completely lost on him. Read it again.

I think your interpretation is very much your own - I'm not seeing anything that suggests that the author considers such a lifestyle to be positive or a symbol of true happiness.

The website is called the art of manliness...

I sent this article to a female friend. Should I not have? Is this article inapplicable for 50% of mankind?

No. My point was that you shouldn't judge a website with that name based on its journalist integrity and expect it cater to both sexes equally. I'm sure most women wouldn't be offended by this article or things on the website but they are clearly not the target audience.

Honestly, if you stopped reading, why did you conment?

umm so that other people wouldn't waste their time. I often read comments for longer articles first and if the top rated comments all agree its not worth reading I won't.

Anyways, HN is a place where both sides should be commented on. I certainly do not read HN hoping that the only people who comment are making congratulatory remarks on everything.

We strongly encourage constructive and specific criticism on this site and it fosters some of the best conversation in both technical, sociopolitcal, eocnomic and other ways.

> Alot of it has to do with the fact that when you view women as objects ... it can be very difficult for men like this to actually engage with an intelligent woman or have a meaningful intimate relationship.

As a non-objectifier, I wonder about this. If you "buy" women, does that automatically mean you objectify all women? Would the same effect be observed in homosexual males?

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