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Comment by mempko | Hacker News Reader

Kids have a great property, they have a bed time. I structure my day so that I come home from work at the same time every day and spend time with the family. My skill building happens when they go to sleep. You can get a good 2-3 hours in a day this way if you need to.

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This. Although how dedicated you want to be with this is up to you, e.g. you didn't mention this, but I assume your relationship with your spouse is important as well. This is what works for me for my relationship with my kids as well as my wife:

- Evenings after work is family time. Focusing on kids if necessary.

- Wednesday evening after kids go to bed, as well as early Saturday morning, is skill building time for me.

- Every other evening after kids go to bed is time spent with my wife.

This tends to be a good mix that keeps everyone happy.

I've been battling with this exact sentiment. I want to spend time skill-building, but my wife is a definite priority.

You're right, 3 hours on Wednesday, and getting up early on a Saturday morning is plenty of time to learn something new, or apply the skills you have to a side-project.

I was lucky in that my natural schedule allows a lot of quiet thinking time without having to short shrift the family time or time with the wife.

I'm up by 430 every morning and in my office by 6, with gym time before I get in. I get a good 2-4 hours of 'me' time every single work day for learning or exploring- and it's also my most creative time of day. The gym lifts the early morning head fog and I get a lot of stuff done.

I'm almost always home by 4:30 or 5 and get a few hours of play time with the kids which usually rejuvenates me more. If I'm having a good day I may get a little exploratory work done after the kids go down, but usually I just let the mind rest a little or read some HN.

Where does time with the wife fit into your schedule? Presumably you must go bed quite early to rise at 0430 everyday.

I usually go to bed about 10, usually at the same time as her. We get a few hours every night to just us.

Mind you, I'm not forcing myself up at 4:30 with an alarm or anything. I'm up when I'm up and it's nearly always before or at 5.

I have a 12-year-old step-daughter. That is how my schedule has shifted -- doing more after her bedtime.

I am lucky though. I am working for an early-stage startup, and there are a lot of opportunity to step up and skill build, not for its own sake, but because we need to.

Sometimes. My kids bedtime is also my bedtime. My 4 yr old sleeps for 9 hrs as do I!

Yes.

But there are two things more important for me: 1. relationship: you have to spend time together to have one... 2. health: sports is a must- not daily ofc but twice per week.

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