That same manager then apologised and said that he didn't intend / want it to be something formal like that at all but it seemed too late.
Hands are tied, wheels go in motion.
As another poster also said, this could very much be part of the toxin healing you described.
An aside: I recommend anyone reading this to keep a warm relationship with your HR; don't need to be friends but simply warm. As well as showing you're a colleague, wheels are oiled for when difficult or unexpected organisational problems arise and need to be solved down the line. Not suggesting this of the OP, but in these discussions it can often turn into 'us vs. them' which is absolutely wrong.