Yes, you can connect to an etcd instance outside of Kubernetes, or deploy etcd on Kubernetes. CoreOS developed the etcd operator for the purposes of self-hosting the system KV store, but you can of course run a "user" etcd.
A better pattern is relying on the objects provided by Kubernetes, which are themselves backed by a lock service (which happens to be etcd, but that's an implementation detail you shouldn't worry about.)
You could, for example, use an Annotation on an object to do leader election. Look at how HA masters are implemented on Kubernetes, for example:
https://github.com/kubernetes/kubernetes/blob/master/pkg/cli...