Comment by existencebox | Hacker News Reader

Comment by existencebox | Hacker News Reader

You're not. Similar age bracket, similar feeling. I've gotten to the point where I honestly feel _bad_ about doing "leisure", even activities I used to enjoy, because I feel like I'm "Wasting time". It's become a bit of a problem, because while I feel like "I can do this as long as it takes" Part of me worries eventually this mythical burnout thing will kick in with no warning and render me unable to even keep a basic income. Or maybe it already has kicked in, and this fear/stress is what it is? Hell if I know, and that's half my reason for posting, to let you know you're not alone in feeling worried about this shit and unsure as to the answers.

The only logical hypotheses introspection has given is that it's reasonable to recognize that compounding value is probably the #1 reliable way to greater wealth/freedom later, so by not generating that initial compounding value early the time is "doubly lost". That combined with newly minted billionaires significantly younger than me off of photo apps makes me feel like I missed the train somewhere as I crank away in a corner on some insane analytics SaaS. The only pragmatic response I've found to that is to just keep cranking, and if this doesn't work change my approach, but that doesn't really help with the mental conflict of if I should enjoy the time I have now but shared with work, or 100% myself now for the purpose of "buying" myself more 100% free time later on.

I realize I gave more of a braindump than anything else, but I hope it gives you a window into the thought process of someone else in a similar sort of mental tumbleweed.

That doesn't sound like a pragmatic response at all.

"Keep doing what you're doing unless it doesn't work in which case do something else"

That sounds like woody allen.

The vast majority of savings is simply unspent income. Income accumulates at a more or less fixed rate, and the extra income you get for extra experience grows much faster than the extra income you get from interest on the unspent portion of that.

If you want to have more money, MAKE more money.

There is a maximum amount of money you can make with your skills, If wealth is truly your goal you should figure out what that is, and do whatever is required to get it.

Working too hard is counter-productive... work too many hours and you'll burn out.

And what is the point of working hard if you don't enjoy it? If you consume yourself with work you don't enjoy do you actually think you'll be able to find things to do in the hypothetical future when you've retired?

https://www.jwz.org/blog/2011/11/watch-a-vc-use-my-name-to-s... puts it: "do what you love because you love doing it. If that means long hours, fantastic. If that means leaving the office by 6pm every day for your underwater basket-weaving class, also fantastic."

If you really want to not work, buying freedom is much easier by reducing your expenses. Betting on getting rich is a bet, not a plan.

In practice there are many paths to freedom, not just getting enough money to not have to work: https://codewithoutrules.com/2016/09/16/sane-workweek/

Yeah this is exactly what I was referring to. I literally feel guilty for doing leisure activities and absolutely feel like Im wasting time. It's led me to build some really cool things and given me the reputation for outputting a lot of quality in a short period of time, but nothing else, really.

I'm in a similar boat, except I have 10 years on top of yours. It's actually been a lot of fun, the learning and building, but I've been driven by the same fear.

First off, this is hard and very few (any?) have this figured out. It took me going through a major depression episode and other, significant, life changes to start to work on this.

About a year ago I've started to change some key habits and that has helped to alleviate this feeling. To start with:

* Reduced the amount of tech news / startup news I consume significantly. I cut down the number of blogs from ~ 300 to ~ 10. * I have a hobby (woodworking in my case). I tried a bunch of hobbies over the years and it took a while to find something that I'm sticking with, but just keep experimenting * Meditation and non-tech and non-business reading has helped. Instead of reading 10 business/startup/tech books for every 1 fiction/biography/history/fun-topic, I reversed that relationship. * Vacations. Not some huge travel-the-world stuff, but a weekend getaway with friends / significant other is amazing. Could just be to look at vintage stores, art galleries, sit on your butt by the pool, etc. Don't have goals, get lost and don't watch the clock

Lastly, the most important piece. Spend the time and the energy you're investing right now in projects and "growing" on figuring out what you want out of life. This is not some existential thing nor is it some grand plan. Starting a company is a goal and good one. Traveling 3 months out of a year is a goal too. Don't get hung up on it, it'll change and evolve over the years. Just start somewhere, you can "pivot" as you move forward.

Here's the most important piece though - how do you measure yourself? Forget realistic/unrealistic or external/internal - doesn't matter. Identify what are the metrics that you use to gauge your progress and what it means for you to have had a successful week (day - too short & month/year - too long).

Then, ask yourself: why that?

The answers to the questions above will help show you a path from feeling like you're spinning in one spot and what to do next.

Reach out if you want to talk about any of it.

One other thing - whether you want to travel or not, reading Vagabonding is helpful for the mindset. Some of Tim Ferriss' writing on this is helpful too.

The idea of financial freedom is not a one-size fits all. It really depends on what you value and how you want to live.

However, that's another existential question without an easy answer, just lots of work on self-awareness.

Guilty? "Guilty" comes from breaking a legal or moral standard. So, what legal or moral standard do you think you are breaking when you do leisure activities?

Legal? None.

Moral? Not really that either.

It sounds (putting words in your mouth here a bit) like you've taken someone's "should" and internalized it to the point where you've given it pseudo-moral force in your thinking. If so, stop it! You don't have to live up to that person's standard of how they think you ought to live your life. Trying to do so makes you miserable. (I think you aren't really satisfied with where it leaves you, based on you saying "... but nothing else, really.")

However, that person is often a parent. It's not as easy as saying "stop doing that" when you've had it drilled into your head for 27 years. It takes a lot of effort, figuring out why you want what you want, and whether you really want it or just have been told that you ought to, and, essentially, deprogramming yourself.

Just want to say I can relate to your train of thought.

But don't go 100% on one thing at any aspect in life. Things change, if you go 80% on something the 20% left is investment in something else.

As you say yourself you need compounding value.

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