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an Emoji keyboard accessoryI can't tell if you literally think that's what it is, or if you're just trying to be dismissive. Emoji support in text fields is just one of the many things it does. It's a dynamic set of buttons that change depending on your task, and I actually really want it. I've been running a third-party app called Touché (https://red-sweater.com/touche/) which gives you the touch bar in a window on your computer, so I can see what things it offers (this isn't actually very useful for actually using, because if I have to switch to my mouse and click a button, there's probably a faster way anyway), and there's some cool stuff in there. What looks especially useful is if you're using Xcode to debug an app, the touch bar has a dedicated button that pauses the debugger, even if Xcode isn't in the foreground, and AFAIK there's no other way to accomplish this (even if you set up an applescript to pause the debugger and hook it up to a keypress, the app will still see you beginning to press the keys before it pauses, potentially changing the state that you were trying to debug at).
> Since 2013, they don't have a desktop for desktop (not web) developers any more. […] iMacs are noisy under load
I haven't ever noticed my iMac being noisy. I'm pretty sure it's quieter than my laptop, and my laptop is pretty darn quiet.
> and who knows how long they will last when kept heated the whole time
I'm really confused as to why you said this. If you think iMacs are noisy, then you think they have strong fans, which means there should be no problem with heat. Now of course I don't think iMacs are noisy, but I think they still do have good heat dissipation and have no worries whatsoever about lifetime.
If you want a developer's desktop, you really should look at an iMac.