Ask HN: Systemd broke my system after updating. Recommend an alternative?

Long story short: after a dist-upgrade, systemd-resolved simply could not resolve any domain names, rendering my ubuntu laptop useless.

I am so off-the-charts sick of Poetteringware degrading my computing experience.

Please make my Christmas a happy one, and recommend me an alternative system: Is Upstart still viable? OpenRC? I'm not sure which one is considered the modern alternative.