As for people taking things too personally (you or otherwise): talk to your team members. Let them know that you perceive their comments as harsh. If you can't come to a consensus about tone, content and voice, then code reviews will always be a friction point between you and your team. Work it out with them, they're all just people with emotions too, after all.

As for the appreciation of code reviews: developers absolutely hate doing things without reason. For what reason does your team do code reviews in the first place? Is that reason unanimously understood? If not, then you'll face a lot of resistance.

In short, get everyone on the same page as to /why/ you want to use this tool (code reviews) and on the same page as to /how/ to use it.

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also general code review advice:

- Don't make it all about style, and if you do, preface that you're nitpicking. automate everything you can when it comes to style.

- Use unambiguous questions, with detail. Set a high bar of quality for reviews by leading the charge yourself and holding others to that standard. Don't be afraid to preface questions with: "I don't think I understand how this works."

- Don't be afraid to applaud really cool things as well. Code reviews don't have to be negative comments only.