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Comment by tbirdz | Hacker News Reader

Interesting idea, but I think you are missing out on the category of happiness that is not related to other people. You can be happy just from your own internal thoughts, actions, accomplishments, without involving other people. I don't even know if the idea of addition and subtraction really apply to internally sourced happiness -- would you just be adding/subtracting from yourself?

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You can be, but people are also naturally social. If you're not, you're going to be lonely or an anomaly (and yes, introverts are still social just tend to be with smaller groups).

Since people are naturally social, the people around them are inevitably going to affect their state of mind - especially if we have a desire to be around them.

I'm happiest on days in which (1) I am in a flow thinking about new math, realizing new connections, (2) I am reading or hearing something beautiful, a poem, a new song, (3) I have some time away from the web, under the stars, on the beach.

People, I'm happy that they are there, but no they don't make me happy.

If I can't give meaning to my own life, who can give it to me?

You're conflating happiness with meaning.

What I'm going to say it's pretty close to what's on /r/im14andthisisdeep, but for some people (including me) finding meaning in their lives is a very good reason for happiness.

Meaning can give you a sense of wellbeing but it's considered to be separate from "happiness". [1]

E.g., parents rate relatively low on happiness yet are still "happy" that they have children. They have a sense of wellbeing from something meaningful.

1. https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/beautiful-minds/the-dif...

For oft, when on my couch I lie

In vacant or in pensive mood,

They flash upon that inward eye

Which is the bliss of solitude;

And then my heart with pleasure fills,

And dances with the daffodils.

- Wordsworth

I don't think social behaviors enter into it. Regardless of how one socializes, it's possible to derive happiness from doing things alone. Just because I derive happiness from doing things with friends doesn't mean I don't ALSO derive happiness from purely internal things. There certainly are long term consequences involved with complete isolation, but that's not really in question, I don't think.

> people are also naturally social

http://www.ted.com/talks/susan_cain_the_power_of_introverts.... http://www.eyrie.org/~eagle/reviews/books/0-307-45220-4.html

Introverts are not hermits. Introverts still live and interact with and within that society. There is a difference between typical day to day social relationships and deep relationships (as with a spouse/best friend/etc.) Introverts may hate the first, but I know few introverts who do not participate in the second in some way (even online as we are now doing.) People are naturally social, it's just a different type of social when discussing introverts versus extroverts. Again, don't confuse introvert with hermits.

If a tree falls in the empty forest, is it happy that it fell?

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