Ask HN: What is your best programming joke?
There are many software, technology and programming related jokes. What is the best joke that you know?
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A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer and a Microsoft software engineer are riding in a car going to a conference. They start down a hill and the brakes go out, and the car crashes into a tree. Luckily, no one is injured, and they all get out of the car and start trying to figure out what happened.
The electrical engineer looks at the car and says "Hmmm, must have been a short-circuit in the ABS electronics."
The mechanical engineer says "no, no, it must have been an over-pressure situation with a brake line, causing the line to burst and allowing the brake fluid to leak out."
They both look at the Microsoft guy who had been quiet so far and ask "what do you think"?
He looks at the car and say "I don't know - let's push the car back to the top of the hill and try it again".
function getTomorrowDate() {
sleep(86400);
return date("Y-m-d");
}So the guy comes back with six loaves of bread.
The computer scientist looks left, sees there's no cars coming, and crosses.
The professional programmer looks left, then looks right -- just in case! -- before crossing the street.
The distributed systems programmer looks left, then looks right, then looks up to make sure there aren't any planes falling out of the sky...
B. Yes, I would like you to tell me a TCP joke.
A. OK, I will tell you a TCP joke.
An extroverted computer scientist looks at YOUR shoes when he talks to you.
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Why do programmers always mix up Halloween and Christmas?
Because Oct 31 == Dec 25!
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How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None, that's a hardware problem
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A DBA walks into a bar, goes up to two tables, and says: "can I join you?".
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Many great jokes here: http://www.hongkiat.com/blog/programming-jokes/
:)
Knock knock. Assembler
The biologist notices that one of the zebra are entirely white, and exclaims, "Wow! Look at that – it’s a completely white zebra! This is an incredible scientific discovery!"
The statistician then responds, "Well, it’s only one zebra out of millions – it’s statistically insignificant."
The computer scientist then sadly laments, "Oh no! A special case!"
This one is always making me laugh (especialy those fish eyes): http://thecodinglove.com/post/72681300803/how-i-picture-our-...
The first one says, "Hello, bartender. I would like a beer."
The second one says, "I would also like a beer.a9545hn1g!#$8uq34fg98^ZDs7tgSDSR("
The bartender asks the first string, "What's up with your friend?"
It replies, "Don't mind him, he's not null-terminated."
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And a variant on the above:
The first string says, "Hello, bartender. I would like a beer."
The second string says, "I would also like a beer.a9545hn1g!#$8uq34fg98^ZDs7tgSDSR("
The bartender replies "root@localhost #"
The buffer overflow exploit worked!
Either way, it's a great joke!
There are 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand Ternary, those who don't and those who mistake it for Binary
DO 10 I=1.10 10 F(I)A C (sea) shell!
- dumb users
- smart users