>ntil the sheer weight of vulnerabilities and incidents causes vendors to radically change their security practices
I've been in the professional IT game for 15 years. The "please run this macro in word to view content" issue still exists today and is one of the main vectors in ransomware. Heck, the "click this to view my photos" 'sexy-pics.exe' problem has not been solved in Windows either. End users don't care about UAC pop-ups, they click through them. See the recent literature on "Security Fatigue."
I think you have way too much faith in the industry to fix its own problems. Its clear that there are many classes of security problems that remain unfixed for decades. We're just seeing the newest version of the very same problems we've failed to address in the past.
I have no idea what the solution here is, but I imagine some level of certification is needed. Perhaps as simple as validating that you're forced to change the default password/keys and auto-update for security updates is on by default with some level of commitment to perform security updates for x amount of years after purchase. Toss in mandatory fail2ban-like functionality and you've patched the most common exploit use cases. I imagine that's a fairly hands-off approach here that won't interrupt business and will cost very little to implement.
On the end-user side of things, having a router that can detect when you're part of a botnet/DDOS and stop traffic would be valuable. Why aren't these $200+ Netgears and Linksys's running any sort of IPS? No IPS in this day and age is pretty crazy. An implementation of snort or similar wouldn't eat too much CPU and would only raise the cost marginally.
Its still very much the wild west out there from a security perspective.