>For example, I’ve told recruiters about my salary expectations and had them laugh and say “no one gives that kind of [salary/equity/vacation/benefits].”

I had a similar experience looking for my first job in Chicago a few years back.

I met with a fairly large general recruiting firm in the area just so they could feel me out.

I named my expectation of 50-60k to which the recruiter replied.

"You know... when I moved to Chicago I was living on 18k"

Not exactly the type of response I expected.