The Inner Game of Everything: 1974 Tennis Book Is Still a Sensation

This video of Timothy Gallwey teaching a woman how to play tennis. In 5 minutes.

The book is one of the best I've ever read (go get it now), it's about mental focus, improvement by not trying and about not judging your results.

I was sitting in front of a really difficult problem earlier today but I kept persisting at it even though at points I got frustrated ("I'm not sure I'm smart enough to do this...") I managed to stop thinking for a bit and try again without understanding the code fully and it ended up working. I'm not saying being intuitive always works with programming but sometimes if you feel out of your depth it can really help push you through.

he also touches upon it on a presentation he did in the mid '80s: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50L44hEtVos

The Usual Way:

1. Criticise or judge past behaviour.

2. Tell yourself to change, instructing with verbal commands repeatedly.

3. Try hard. Make yourself do it right.

4. Critical judgement about results leading to repetition of process.

The Inner Game Way:

1. Non-judgmentally observe existing behaviour.

2. Ask yourself to change, programming with image and feel.

3. Let it happen!

4. Calm observation of results leading to continuing observation of process until behaviour is automatic.

Highlights:

- The secret to winning any game lies in not trying too hard.

- … to value the art of relaxed concentration above all skills.

- Getting it together … involves: i. learning to program your Self 2 with images rather than instructing yourself with words. ii. learning to ‘trust thyself’ (Self 2) to do what you (Self 1) ask of it. iii. learning to see ‘non-judgementally’, i.e., to see what is happening rather than merely noticing how well or how badly it is happening.

- It is the initial act of judgment that provokes the thinking process.

- First the mind judges the event, then groups events, then identifies with the combined event, and finally judges itself. As a result … these self-judgments become self-fulfilling prophecies.

- Letting go of judgments does not mean ignoring errors. It simply means seeing events as they are and not adding anything to them. Judgment begins when an [event] is labelled ‘bad’ and … a reaction of anger, frustration or discouragement follows. Use descriptive but non-judgmental words to describe the events you see.

- The substitution of [positive thinking] for [negative thinking] may appear … to have short-range benefits, but … the honeymoon ends all too soon.

- Always look for approval and wanting to avoid disapproval, this subtle ego-mind sees a compliment as a potential criticism. [Its] reasons, “If the pro is pleased with one kind of performance, he will be displeased by the opposite. If he likes me for doing well, he will dislike me for not doing well.” The standard of good and bad [has] been established, and the inevitable result [is] divided concentration and ego-interference.

- Ending judgment means you neither add nor subtract from the facts before your eyes. Things appear as they are — undistorted. In this way, the mind becomes more calm.

- It is the mistrust of [the doing self by the thinking/worrying self] which causes both the interference called ‘trying too hard’ and that of too much self-instruction.

- The more ‘important’ the point, the more [the thinking/worrying self] will try to control the shot, and this is exactly when tightening up occurs. The results are almost always frustrating.

- The main job of Self 1, the conscious ego-mind, is to set goals, that is, to communicate to Self 2 what he wants from it and then to let Self 2 do it.

- In a tennis-playing society, Self 1 can assume an important role by frequently exposing Self 2 to models of high-caliber tennis.

- As Self 1 learns to let go, a growing confidence in the ability of Self 2 emerges.

- When one learns how to break a habit, it is a relatively simple matter to learn which ones to break.

- We all develop characteristic patterns of acting and thinking, and each such pattern exists because it serves a function. The time for change comes when we realize that the same function could be served in a better way.

- There is no need to fight old habits. Start new ones. It is the resisting of an old habit that puts you in that trench. Starting a new pattern is easy when done with childlike disregard for imagined difficulties. You can prove this to yourself by your own experience.

- Awareness of what is, without judgment, is relaxing, and is the best precondition for change.

- Concentration is not staring hard … or thinking hard about something. Concentration is fascination of mind.

- After I developed by practice some small ability to concentrate my mind, I discovered that concentration was not only a means to an end, but something of tremendous value in itself. As a result, instead of using concentration to help my tennis, I now use tennis as a means to further increase concentration.

- Simply focus on your breath, absorbing more and more conscious energy into the awareness of the experience of breathing. It may help to allow your hands to open as you inhale and to close as you exhale. Then ask your hands to open and close slightly less. Don’t force your fingers to do this; simply ask them and let them respond. If your mind begins to wander, bring it back gently to your breathing. As your mind stills and settles into a calm state, let yourself be alert to every split second of breathing and experience as fully as you can this state of relative quiet.

- There would be no problem with competition if one’s self-image were not at stake.

- Obstacles are a very necessary ingredient to this process of self-discovery.

- It is only against the big waves that he is required to use all his skill, all his courage and concentration to overcome; only then can he realize the true limits of his capacities.

- Normally, we tend to concentrate only when something we consider important is happening, but the player of the Inner Game recognises increasingly that all moments are important ones and worth paying attention to, for each moment can increase his understanding of himself and life.

I wish more of this Russian technique would be available in English: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deconcentration_of_attention

edit: > By 2006, research firm Marketdata estimated the "self-improvement" market in the U.S. as worth more than $9 billion (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-help#The_market).