1 + 2 = "my bulb is an open spec made by factory X running on transparent software maintained by people who care"
3 = "and I host it myself on Y"
3 is the missing link, and it's yesterday's self-hosting that hasn't made it to it's next incarnation. When we'd self-host our web site, we owned the box, owned the set-up and felt absolutely in control of the system. It may not have been as reliable or fast as a hosting service, but there is comfort in full ownership and full control. To their own detriment the shared hosting industry went to shit when they settled for their shady marketing eco-system (paid reviews, not unlimited unlimited quotas, cheap bad service). No one trusts shared hosting now, and so Squarespace and the like have gained popularity, but that's a fully corporate owned opaque service.
The closest to 3 we have now is AWS and Google Cloud and the like, but they are not made for normal users. Dropbox would have been a good candidate but they lose credibility with every word they speak (damage control clearly centered on themselves, ignoring customer complaints).
3 could be 1) a new self-hosting local box that has it's own app or something that's fully contained and in your house. 2) A cloud provider that has managed to detach their corporate interests from their shared infrastructure (like amazon and google have towards developers). Consumers don't want their IoT console cluttered with ads or "recommended items for you" and the last thing consumers want is for Google to mine their personal IoT information. Or 3) a standardized open source cloud platform where users can take their data from one provider to another while enjoying full ownership (local backups), privacy (full encryption), and portability (zero lock-down).