Comment by tuna-piano | Hacker News Reader

Comment by tuna-piano | Hacker News Reader

"As time went by, the settlers from Europe noticed something: No Indians were defecting to join colonial society, but many whites were defecting to live in the Native American one."

The passage shocked me, as it is extremely surprising, and speaks to the core of our societal growth over the past few hundreds of years not leading to maximum happiness. The passage is from this David Brooks column (which I think is definitely worth the three minutes to read): http://www.nytimes.com/2016/08/09/opinion/the-great-affluenc...

The core thought is that people trade up for comfort (including privacy), but that they lose out on the overall bonds with other people that are what really makes us happy.

One extremely clear choice: Do you work from home (more comfy) or an office (more social)?

The work from home choice seems extremely relevant to me. Is it actually bad for happiness in the long term to do something that's so much more comfortable (no commuting, no dressing up, feeling of being at home, etc)?

When I think about the best times in my own life, they were the times when I had a close group of people I lived and hung out with (college, summer camp, etc). I assume it's the same for many others reading this. So why do we not live more like that into our adult years?

I work from home. If I were single or if the kids had moved out of the house and my SO worked, your comment would probably be true for me (better to be in the office). But, I've had a chance to see my young children grow up in a way that couldn't have happened had I been in the office, all while doing significant meaningful work. Certainly that's more social with a closer group of people (family). So, it probably depends on circumstances.

What meaningful work did you do?

I love working from home. But it's because in the Summer I can choose to split my day in two, spend a sunny afternoon riding my bike around the city with my girlfriend, grab a beer with a friend, and finish my work in the evening; or I can go out to the country, visit my friends' office and work from there... or whatever.

Sitting at the office from 10 to 6, breathing in sterile AC, watching the world pass me by through the window was the depressing bit.

> The core thought is that people trade up for comfort (including privacy), but that they lose out on the overall bonds with other people that are what really makes us happy.

The fundamental importance of high quality bonds with other people is something I wish was emphasised more. The following TED talk describes a pretty interesting research experiment done over a long time frame which essentially comes to this conclusion: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8KkKuTCFvzI

Excellent video. It's amazing how much time we spend on hobbies, learning better skills, having fun - and how little time we spend trying to optimize our lives for happiness.

I work in an office. I could not be more isolated.

I agree with you about working in an office. Regarding the passage though, I think it can be explained by things other than one society is happier. Like, there is such a thing as romanticized notions of another culture that are not accurate. Or a tribal identity that makes it very difficult to leave regardless of happiness.

Relevant post: http://squid314.livejournal.com/340809.html

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