Haha, I doubt you're giving me horns

Of course when you make it yourself you can do whatever you like (although you lose the economies of scale).

Trying to get something on the go in this area pretty much means you're reduced to Dunkin Donuts, Mickey D's, or whatever paltry offerings the gas station Quik-e-mart carries, though.

Non-native speaker here. Why could this be understood as a cuckold joke? (My dictionary says this about cuckold: "The husband of an adulteress, often regarded as an object of derision.")

Interesting; that does look like a certain type of sandwich popular in the EU. Where does the name come from?

I'd personally be looking for something like this;

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-5vJPM91yqH4/UYzAqHKG0GI/AAAAAAAACM...

and that's not that easy to find abroad. Bad cheese or bad bread but usually both unfortunately.

Bagels are very far removed from the sort of thing you would get in a typical bakery or sandwich shop here. So much that I could eat a granary sandwich from my local bakery any time, no matter what I ate before, while I can eat a bagel if i'm very hungry and everything else is closed. I tried as my wife loves them but they are not related IMHO besides that they are considered 'bread'.