Thank you for the feedback! :) I understand what you mean.
May I ask though, how can I convey my frustration to anyone? and how to I avoid becoming jaded and apathetic to my goals?
May I ask though, how can I convey my frustration to anyone? and how to I avoid becoming jaded and apathetic to my goals?
Spend time cultivating empathy and patience.
You don't. If something is impeding you, calmly tell someone who can help that you're having trouble doing something because of XYZ. Don't be negative or pessimistic or blame anyone.
The problem is if you're always frustrated, everyone is going to view you as an angry asshole. I am constantly frustrated but I gave up doing anything about it when it's out of my control. I just move on.
Or, even better, ask what you can do to help with getting XYZ done.
Frustration is rarely a constructive thing to convey. It may seem okay at times, but even if it's objectively justifiable, it's going to leave an impression on people.
Too many of those, and everything you say is viewed through that lens.
That person could also be a project manager or any other person who is ultimately responsible for deliverables. It IS their job to make sure you deliver. If you are getting constantly blocked for external reasons, they should know and work towards fixing those issues.
I'm in the exact same boat, btw. Good luck.
It's toxic to compare people's weaknesses to your own strengths, or to compare your own weaknesses with other's strengths.
Enjoy connecting to people and making banter. Stop trying to get "somewhere". Don't even try to push for the project to finish earlier. It finishes when it finishes. The quality it's done at is the quality it's going to be. Do what you're going to do then step back. Focus on the present, and enjoy it because it is everything you have. The only "somewhere" everyone ever gets to is death. What's more important, your joy in the present, or some illusion of the future?
Choices are illusory. Our lives are not ours to control. We can follow the flow of life's river and enjoy the sights life offers, or push against the current, and encounter resistance, spending all our time bucketing water out of our boats. The only choice we have is between focusing on reality of the present, the small boons we experience every day, a smile, an eye contact, a joke, listening to a story, and focusing on the illusions of the future, finding weaknesses in yourself or others through comparison, fighting against the current of life. Who are you in this moment?
Choices are illusory? Nope. Life is an endless, continuous stream of choices, and making those choices is the only thing that you can do to influence how your own life goes.
By good choice I mean one I would never regret no matter what the outcome was, and instead would have regretted if I never made it.
That's what I mean by choices being merely an illusion. All I can pick is the present, or the illusion of being in control of the future.