The 11 Rules of Happiness
blog.gism.net
blog.gism.net
It opens lots of doors.
Heck, I outright disagree with half of them.
> 4: Always squeeze the hell out of the other guy’s hand while shaking it.
BS. Hand-killing is how weak people try to assert themselves. The highest quality people are very gentle when shaking hands. Bill Clinton and Richard Branson, for instance, are both known for very loose handshakes. When I meet a hand-killer, I file him into "weak and powerless person desperately trying to assert himself in the world" category mentally. I used to be a hand-killer, but started shaking hands more gently and loosely once realizing this.
> 7: Do not seek the spotlight. Only idiots want to be famous, and they get ripped apart by said fame.
Martin Luther King? Gandhi? Ben Franklin? Idiots?
> 10: Have goals. If you have a goal, you will achieve it eventually. You simply need to have that goal.
Fuzzy positive thinking. Have the goal, and works towards it! Contrary to romantic comedy wisdom, goals do not magically happen without effort on the part of the goal-seeker.
Some of his points aren't bad, but none of them are particularly good or insightful or new. "Think positive! Have goals! Be happy! Be nice to people!" We can find better articles to submit and upvote and spend our time with.
I don't know if I'd say MLK, Gandhi, or Franklin really "sought the spotlight". Their fame was mostly incidental of their deeds and wasn't particularly sought after, as a movie starlet or other pop-culture would-be icon might seek after fame.
Full disclosure on this, I guess, is that I also can't see much appeal in fame. All semblances of privacy are lost, constant rumor-flinging about the lives of yourself and your family, etc. There are much better ways to get recognition than becoming a household name, imo.
I picked those three examples carefully - they're all men that heavily, actively courted attention and exposure, sometimes in very radical ways. Now, they did it for good reasons and put their fame to good usage, but they all were incredibly self promoting. Franklin was prolific at writing, debating, negotiating, and promoting his works and opinions. He even wrote about himself humorously in the third person under pseudonyms, making ridiculous claims at times. Gandi wrote 60+ letters per day to the most famous people in the world, including almost all world leaders, and actively courted press, especially for his hunger strike when he was almost constantly surrounded by media. MLK of course staged many demonstrations and gave many prominent speeches, going out of his way to break laws and get arrested in the name of civil disobedience.
All three of those men actively courted attention and media coverage, and thus fame - now, if the argument was, "don't seek fame for fame's sake", or "only become famous if you have a good reason to aside from pride" - I could buy that. But it's not what the author said. He said only idiots want to be famous. I'm rather certain Franklin, Gandhi, and King all knew what they were getting into and wanted to be famous. I also think none of those guys were idiots.
> Full disclosure on this, I guess, is that I also can't see much appeal in fame.
I feel the same way personally, but I don't think intending to get famous is stupid. The more people who know who you are, the bigger potential impact you can have. Actually, that's a pretty hard consideration I've made - some of the things I want to do would make me rather famous if I succeeded. I mean, hell, I spoke at a small conference once in a big city, and I was greeted 5-6 times while going about my day for the next week. That's a little scary, y'know? So I see it as a hard tradeoff, but it probably makes sense for a lot of people.
Edit: Didn't expect to be downvoted on this one - did I make a factual error? I know fame is commonly associated with degeneracy, but I think that's mistaken - saying "Benjamin Franklin actively wanted to get famous, and did so, and used his fame for good" - is that incorrect? I think the same of MLK and Gandhi. Actively wanted to get famous, and did so, and used their fame for good. Agree? Disagree?
Here's another example: Rosa Parks, who after more than a decade of involvement in the civil rights movement decided to put herself into the spotlight to challenge discriminatory seating practices in the Montgomery, Alabama bus system. It's important to note that she was not acting in a vacuum but as the public face of a large, broad-based social justice movement.
Her disobedience and subsequent arrest sparked an organized bus boycott and related direct actions that lasted over a year, spurred a federal legal challenge and ultimately resulted in a court order striking down the bus policy.
Side note: a young Baptist minister at the time, Martin Luther King got his start as a civil rights activist through his participation organizing the Bus Boycott.