I read an article in the Harvard Business Review relating to this some time ago. The author basically argued that social interaction comes from the limbic brain, so trying to learn it the way one would mathematics is awkward and misguided. The complex, inconsistent world of social cues simply has too many variables for logical processing, but each human is equipped with an older, instinctual understanding of this world that sometimes goes ignored or even repressed. Maybe the key to success here really is learning to stop thinking too hard and trusting one's instincts.

A good example is how we tell people they're being rude. Many nerds want an explicit, clear answer, maybe even a right/wrong mark or a grade. In reality, we respond to body language with body language. If everyone's avoiding your eyes or shooting you dirty looks, you've probably said a bad word. Sometimes it's more subtle, such as with the many meanings of crossed arms and angled stances.

I dealt with these challenges by studying acting. The practice of theater collects and refines centuries of study in body language, emotion and personal interaction. Even more importantly, it is a practice rather than a knowledge base, which matters if one believes that one physically cannot learn certain things from a book.