Dear Tech, You Suck at Delight

I just asked Siri "I don't know what to do with my dirty socks"

It responded with "OK. It's no big deal that you don't know"

I'm guessing that the system is seeing if there is something that is an option that it can provide "open app, call something.. etc" if not then just reassuring in this case, that there is nothing wrong (or that the system cannot provide an answer)

The author brought up an important point which is the system needs to be able to handle these outliers (ei: imma shoot myself --> suicide hotline) But only the engineers can tell us how many of these requests are pulled into the system, and how to direct the alerts off. It would be super helpful to be able to tell CHP hey theres a object in the highway on 280N next to Saratoga Ave right from Siri//Google voice. But there needs to be underlying infrastructure for that from both ends.

I find this controversy pretty weird. I can't decide how to feel about it or what I think users and companies should do. Here are some of my thoughts.

1. People never used Siri to report an emergency before Siri existed. Is there something dangerous about dialing a number or using a dedicated emergency app? Should people have the expectation to rely on something so unpredictable (voice-controlled UI) when the technology just isn't there yet?

2. Is Siri's inability to understand sexual assault a consequence of Puritanism, which also kept (keeps?) nudity out of the App Store? Is it just that sexual assault is something related to sex, and therefore in a category that US corporations often stay away from? (For those outside the US, having any kind of sexual content in your product can lead to backlash in the large, conservative swathes of the country.)

3. Can problems like this be solved with plugins, like the ones Google is working on? Should it be the user's duty to find those plugins, or should there be a wizard that takes the user through filling in the blocks of functionality that the manufacturer doesn't (or won't) fill?

I recently bought an iPhone, after a five year hiatus. A few months ago at 5:30 a.m., while driving through though the Bay Area, I asked Siri "What city am I in?"

Siri replied, "Calling Ian", and proceeded to call my contact.

I haven't used Siri since.

I don't understand why anyone would ask Siri these questions (/statements) in the first place. Surely you just call the police. And if for some reason the police are not an acceptable option for you, what on earth would cause Siri to be your second port of call?