You aren't a gift, you're a business- your business is making entrepreneurs think you can further their business. Your website is unprofessional and doesn't mention who you are, and who you are is the most important.
TechStars and YC aren't about the 15k- most of the companies who get accepted these days don't need it. TechStars and YC help people build successful products because the people behind both programs have a background of launching successful products, with rolodexes to match.
Right now you're some guy with a website. No one cares. To make them care, you have to show why you're someone they should care about. That's marketing, and right now you aren't marketing. That's why, in your current incarnation, you're fucked.
Rethink, redesign, relaunch, and then hopefully you can get this off the ground.