Remote openings are not possible. You can fly to Hong Kong and open a bank account in person, and they may (or may not) open one for you - but getting payment processing for a Hong Kong corporation with no processing history is basically impossible for the average person.
I have a Hong Kong company and I know many people who also have Hong Kong companies, and I speak from experience.
As for your other points about Thailand, you’d be wrong about that also - Thailand has no problem with you working independently or from coffee shops at all, it is not against the law and getting long term visas or even self-funded work permits for long stays is trivial.
As for companies, you can set up a BOI company for technology corps which is tax exempt for the first 8 years and the 4 thais for every foreigner rule is not applied, as I have.
However, in a round about way you have proved my point - living in these types of locations is preferable, but doing business here is usually not. Hence, why people incorporate elsewhere and the Stripe Atlas product nails it.
Cheers