Hacker News Reader

Comment by amohr | Hacker News Reader

Moral of the story: If you get an interview, be really nice to Jessica.

As an aside, I cannot stand people being rude to people that they perceive as the receptionist or somehow lesser in stature to them. Take someone out to lunch and watch how they interact with the waiter and that will tell you a lot about their character.

Couldn't agree more. Its amazing how entitled some people feel.

Restaurants are probably the best example, especially when people are outrageous to the waiter, hostess, or barback when problems are clearly outside of their control (kitchen issues, staffing issues). Other good places to judge this characteristic: Taxi Cabs and customer-support calls (you dont need to be on the call, simply listening to the person will tell you enough).

Also, to be clear, that doesnt mean that people have to be doormats - just not a complete asshole. Empathy goes a long way.

I try to avoid doing business with people who fail this test - is usually means they are highly emotional / rash about decisions, or that they don't mind badgering other people to get their way. Both are bad.

True story: recently, I was having dinner with a young lady and she discovered a hair in her food. She said "Call the waiter over and chew him out for me." If dates could be awarded Darwin Awards, that line won two.

Nice story, I hope you said 'sorry love that's mine' and poked your fingers in her food to take it out:)

I have to say I have an equal dislike for people who assume that any female who dares to enter the big bad world of technology must have some sort of clerical role.

Did anyone see the show with Richard Branson, "Quest for the best" or something. He almost sent somebody home for failing to assist the taxi driver with the suitcases, after the taxi got stuck. Nobody realized until later that the taxi driver was actually Richard Branson himself.

The Rebel Billionaire: Branson's Quest for the Best (2004)

A receptionist is in lesser stature to you, though—you're trying to deal with the receptionist's boss as an equal, so when you get the boss's subordinate, they are then logically your subordinate as well (assuming transitivity of classism.) To put it another way—no matter how old you are, your friend's little brother has less stature than you. I'm not saying this is right or proper—but this is how the math works, when, for example, figuring out how polite to cast your speech as in Japanese.

Separately, though, I do think that the very concept of being made to deal with someone's personal secretary instead of the person themselves is a rude gesture by that person, because usually a personal secretary has no authority to help you with your problems. It's the same sort of rudeness implied by redirecting you five times to different departments on a support call, but immediately and in person. (Note that a receptionist in, e.g. a company lobby is a totally separate and useful thing; it is only when the receptionist has a one-to-one relationship with the number of people they route information to that it becomes a snub.)

"Don't be yourself--be someone a little nicer." Mignon McLaughlin

At US companies--I can't speak to how things work in Japan--departmental admins/secretaries often wield an enormous amount of influence and can absolutely help or hurt you. A personal secretary almost always has the ability to help you if they choose to. Your attitude toward them can make a difference.

Niceness is not the same thing as determination. Also, trying to flatter someone described as a good judge of character doesn't seem like a good idea to me. /serious

"... Moral of the story: If you get an interview, be really nice to Jessica ..."

Bad idea.

I can't tell for sure, but what Jessica is most likely interpreting is sub-conscious gestural leakage. A fancy term meaning you exhibit both facial and gestural signs that can be read. For example if you are be probed to check for flexibility, a necessity in "fog of war" situations in Startups, and you exhibit a "fearful" or "sad" facial micro-expression ~ http://face.paulekman.com/aboutmett2.aspx this could be how Jessica is determining a flake. You can tell a person maybe showing certain emotions but you cannot be sure if they are "conscious" (lying) or "unconscious". Judgment is required. Conscious lying can also be masked by certain types of pharmaceuticals which can mask these feelings.

YCombinator could improve themselves in the selection process by getting better at recognising the fundamentals of faces, emotion and deception ~ http://www.paulekman.com/micros/ Naturals such as Jessica interpret but not fully understand the science of it meaning you can get false positives.

Reply on news.ycombinator.com