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Comment by Shad0w59 | Hacker News Reader

This happens in Blizzard's Hearthstone as well.

People enjoy saying "Hello" just as they deliver the finishing blow.

Interesting: In World Series of Poker, "Thanks!" is one of the permitted auto-texts. I find it annoying when people say "Thanks!" immediately after winning a hand / before anyone compliments them on their play or win. Sounds like Hearthstone's "Hello" deathblows.

That says something about language, how the rules affect what's considered "offensive," and how some will work within the rules to create new offenses.

I think "offence" is required to build human relationships. I find myself say something in a joking manner to my best friend that would be offensive to anyone else. In a way I think it's a test - you test if the relationship is strong enough to withstand the offence, and if the friend gives the appropriate response to show you he in fact did not get offended, the relationship is affirmed and becomes stronger. Here's an example on a phone call to my friend, who is engaged, on Valentine's night.

Me: "whatcha doing?"

Him: "eating dinner"

Me: "With two girls? You fox"

Him: "haha, parents"

Me: "Wish them a sexy valentine's day in bed for me"

Him: "Haha you fuck."

Then we both laugh.

And then there are times, when I probe potential new friends with the less intense, but same kind of speech, and they take it seriously, and that's a "test failure" meaning a confirmation it'll be difficult to build a relationship with them. Of course, sometimes it works, and I make a new friend.

Ah, now this is interesting. I can see that I often fail friendship tests such as yours. I don't actually tend to take things seriously, but I'm particularly bad at showing that I'm not taking something seriously. Or so I've been told, though I'm not entirely sure what I'm doing wrong. Fortunately I have an amazing wife and a few good friends, so making new ones isn't particularly important to me. Which I guess is likely part of the problem. Anyway - I hope your parents Valentine's day was unique and experimental.

You're doing fine. I think there's need to be potential for friendship in the first place. If one person don't get the other's humour or the other person don't get the response, I think it could be because there's not enough shared experience or shared perspectives for the two people involved, and that's that. There's nothing you need to do - the kind of person you are, will likely be friends with, the kind of people, your kind of person tends to be friends with, so enjoy. :)

understood. though, there are different rules of engagement for potential friends and a bunch of mostly random people with whom you're playing a game. Still, agreed, there may be place for offense. And offense can enter even without an invitation.

hearthstone also allows "Thanks", and it is also used when you make a mistake (although there is also a "mistake" text).

The interesting thing is that you could actually say "thanks" (or "well played" or "hello") in a neutral way, but if you are on the losing side you are very likely to interpret them as mocking any way, which personally increases my annoyance at losing wildly. I desperately crave for a "f* you" emote at times.

But blizzard has been smart: you can preventively mute your opponent, and just get rid of the thing altogether.

Mute sounds great. It also aligns interests: if you want to be heard, you won't want to act like too big a jerk. Be interesting to see how the mutes are manifested: is it quiet -- you know you've muted me but I don't -- or more-widely communicated? Be great if the mute action was broadcast to appropriate players. "riffraff has muted smcnally." Then others would have less tolerance for my nonsense if they had affinity for you, or they might view you as overly-sensitive if otherwise. The latter would govern abusive or reasonless muting.

AFAIK there is no indication that you have been muted, which I think is in fact not ideal, as I agree with what you say: you should know when people find you annoying (thought that might encourage the behaviour for trolls, not sure)

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